Relative Choice!

Before you read this one, want all my readers to know that this is NOT my original work. I’m rewriting a story which I had heard as a teenager (ages back). The story goes something like this…

Eons ago, there lived a king in Greece. He was known for his administrative skills and his generosity. But he had this policy, if he felt something was good for him, he would enforce that as a law and expected people to practice it religiously.

Going by these lines, he got a bed made of gold, for his special guests. He ordered the length of the bed to be exactly 5ft 7inches. Once the bed was ready, he took the test nap and felt that bed was the best ever on which one could sleep, as he exactly 5ft 7inches tall. So anyone who would be his special guest was expected to sleep on that bed. Then how did he manage to solve the problem of fitting in either taller or shorter people, on that bed. Simple, he created this rule, if someone was taller, his legs would be chopped off or if someone was shorter wooden piece equivalent to the difference in length, would be nailed into the guest’s legs. Over a period of time, there were instances of both, shorter and taller guest, suffering from this idiocy of the king. Yet, a couple of them who measured 5ft 7inches enjoyed the king’s hospitality.

This goes on to show only one thing. “What is perfect for one, maybe harmful to others. What is most harmful to some maybe perfectly suitable for some one else” Another conclusion some sages have drawn from this adage is that “Creating rules and expecting everyone to fit into it is the biggest mistake in the history of mankind” Most choices in life are relative and that’s the way it should be! Generalization seldom works.

Though we have come a long time, this concept of generalizing things has hardly changed. Take this example… Just ask some of your friends, “Would it be wise to live in the US or in India?” Blindly, an over whelming majority of them will hum “Of course! US” Truth is, neither the US nor India is a perfect paradise. It all depends on your preferences and priorities. By rigidly holding onto a mindless notion, ignoring personal preferences and expecting people to abide by it, are we not making mockery of our (so called) evolved society?

Humility

I'm writing here after a while. My schedule has been packed with work and academics. Along with these, some short-term and long-term planning has also contributed in keeping me off from writing! Phew...

The latest inspiration of this article comes from my Professor, whose wisdom, be it any walk of life, is unquestioned, has a plethora of information, helpful yet unbelievably modest. Not only computer science, but you could take some of the best lessons on humility from him.

I have always observed this astonishing phenomenon. Mostly, the brightest student in class is very humble and helpful (however exceptions are prevalent). But the 'so called' or 'self proclaimed' intelligent ones are exactly opposite of it. Same probably is true with teachers. The best ones don't want to force you respect them by scaring you, but they 'earn' it by the aura they carry around them. Even offices are no different. A situation where your Project Lead is very harsh, Project Manager is gentle and his boss is very friendly, is not very uncommon.

My father, who is wise and well-read, is another such person who often inspires me by his humility. People in his age group tend to brag about their past glories and wisdom. I have never seen him indulging in such behavior. He leads by example, instead of lecturing, indirectly forcing you to admire him.

I was just wondering, is it that high status, success teaches such people to be humble. Or is because these people have always shown humility they have risen in ranks? As a sign off quote for this article, I selected this one… "Always be humble to people on your way up, you never know when you will meet them on your way down"

Cubbon Park

To any Bangalorean, Cubbon Park is such a familiar name. Though it would not be fair to compare the Cubbon Park with the Central Park located in Manhattan, it would not be completely unfair to make comparison in between their respective statures in their respective cities.

I have always loved Cubbon Park and visited this place numerous times, at various times of a day. This is what my observation revealed. If you happen to go there by morning, you will see a bunch of rich people who drive miles in their posh cars for their morning walk. A little while later, the young and vibrant employees who work in fancy locations use this road as a ‘short-cut’ to reach their offices. A little later, by around 11:00, that is when the people from small villages around Bangalore visit this place, either for picnic or as a getaway with their ‘could-be’ soul-mate. This is the scene till evening, until IT sector employees get back from office. After that time, people who want a shady place for shady activities are commonly found here.

What amazes me is; why the naïve population from villages doesn’t feel like coming over for a morning walk in Cubbon Park. Or why the rich don’t make this place their getaway during day time, instead of a park restricted only for their morning walk. If shady activates are prevalent during late evening, why nothing is done to stop it? Well I never found any logical answers to these questions. To me, Cubbon Park will always be a place where I can sit peacefully and think calmly, when I’m distressed. In fact I composed this entire article sitting there.

If you are wondering, why I posted this article now, the answer is… I had written this article back in June 2009, with some editing needed. This time my New Year resolution was to give up procrastination and nail down incomplete tasks. That’s exactly what I’m doing now!

Wish all my readers a very happy 2010 and beyond!

Words Of Wisdom

Only after the semester comes to an end, I have excess time to spare for my personal hobbies. Just like now. Making use of this excess time, I wrote down a story, based on an old adage, of course with some modification. Hope, readers enjoy reading it and learn from it too.

Long ago, in a village, a man was walking past his friend, who was climbing up a cocoanut tree. When he asked his friend about the reason for him to climb up the cocoanut tree, his friend said, “My cat has high fever and hence I’m climbing up the cocoanut tree to pluck some special grass, which will cure my cat”. Though each word from his friend appeared to be a lie, the man just gave an acknowledging smile and moved away.

Few days later, again while he was going past the same area, he again saw the same friend climbing up the cocoanut tree. Again he asked for the reason and got the same answer from his friend. This time he got furious and said, “Do you think, I’m a fool to take such words. I know the only reason you were climbing up the cocoanut tree was to steal some tender cocoanuts. Please don’t do it. It will harm you. You are stealing as well as lying. Shame on you!” To this his friend started making an illogical argument and started an emotional drama. Controlling his anger, the man left the place, with a smile.

Months later, again the same situation occurred. On enquiry this time around, his friend replied, “This time, it’s my goat which is suffering from high fever. I am climbing up to pluck the special grass which will cure my goat” Without uttering a word, the man left the place.

The friend was surprised by this action and went to a sage and asked him for an explanation for the man’s behavior on all three instances. The sage replied, “First time when you lied, your friend realized you were lying but ignored it, thinking there might be some reason behind your lies. When you lied to him for the second time, he felt you were mistaking his kindness with stupidity and he made it clear that he understood your lies. This time, he expected a lie from you and just ignored your words, and concluded you as a worthless person. When life gives you a chance to improve, use it wisely. But if you repeat your mistakes, you will lose your value. There is no way that your friend is ever going to trust you. Make sure you don’t repeat this kind of behavior with others.”

The moral of this story is obvious. I hope each one of follows the sage’s words in our lives, if we are not following them, before reading this story!

Being Alone & Being Lonely!

This is quite a random thought, felt like posting it on my blog.

What's the difference in between being alone and being lonely?

Here is my simple explanation;

When I am away from people, I read a book, listen to my favorite music and of course study hard, I consider being alone!

When I am away from people, I feel like talking to someone close and start scrolling the address book of my phone, only to conclude, I have no one to talk to, I consider being lonely!

Changing America!

For most of us, an American, in general is a spend-thrift who hardly believes in saving money. It is quite true, and if you have lived here for a while, you will realize that. But this American mindset is fast changing. Probably the phase from when I landed in this country till date has been the second worst time this country has seen (after the GREAT DEPRESSION), and hence I, like many others have been able to see this shift in attitude.

Today, in my campus, I got a note from a bunch of volunteers who want students to be more responsible than their previous generation. That note looked something like this…

HOLIDAYS ARE HERE AND WE HAVE SOME NOTES FOR YOU. CHECK THIS LIST TWICE BEFORE ENJOYING YOUR CHRISTMAS BREAK!

• Budget your holiday spending: Don’t buy what you can’t afford. Plan your budget and stick to it.

• Shop Wisely: Come up with ideas before you go shopping. Check out online for good deals and check if others are also interested in buying the same thing, so that you can get some bulk discount. Remember, a sale is good, only if you need a particular thing. Otherwise it can be a tempting trap.

• Pay by cash: With cash you can track your expenses better. Avoid credit cards which are the root cause for the rising debt-rate.

• Track your expenses: Track your expenses and items you want to buy. Neither buy excess number of items, nor exceed your overall budget.

For people who have been raised in India, these guidelines were rooted in them. Indians don’t require a special emphasis on being frugal. But with our country’s economy doing better than the most, I suspect if there is some need for distributing such guidelines. “We are doing well and so why should we be frugal in our approach”, best describes the attitude of our current generation. For those, here is some food for thought. If the USA, land of opportunities, with great economy, an open society and tremendously blessed with natural resources can burn its fingers by showing reckless attitude towards its expenditure, wouldn’t India take a bigger hit, if we imitate the reckless attitude in spending?

It is said that the wise learn from other’s mistakes while fools are inspired by other’s mistakes, to repeat it. Now it is up to us to prove ourselves, wise or otherwise!

The Gender Disparity

Recently, the Indian Air Force (IAF) made a statement, which was viewed as a controversial one by many. I heard a lot of people talk about it, read a lot of material and then felt that the statement which was issued was not as controversial as few of us made it out to be.

The statement implied that women are not well suited for direct combat roles in the IAF, especially in the role of fighter pilot. Well, to me it made no attack on women’s intellectual capabilities. Yes, it’s a fact that a woman’s physiology works against her in many walks of life. So, just to show equality, would it make sense to make an investment, which will not give the desired returns?

If someone asks me, are men and women equal? My answer is, ‘No’, though I am mindful of the fact that my mother and two sisters are women. I feel men and women are unique and should not be compared or contrasted. Comparing them would be like comparing apples and oranges. I am of the opinion, that it is more important to understand the differences between the two sexes and play the role which appropriately fits each one. To support my point, here are two quick examples…

In the game of Tennis, a men’s match can last for five sets, but a women’s match can utmost last for three sets. Would it be apt for women to play five sets, to claim equality? Or, can men look after a one day old infant, like women do? Well, let’s respect nature’s plot. We must acknowledge that men and women have their unique strengths and weaknesses. Why not play roles that suit our respective strengths instead of arguing for non-existent equality and become counterproductive.

Maturity… Explanation

Some questions are way too simple, yet to answer them remains a very hard task. Here is some food for thought. Someone recently asked me, “What is maturity?” Simple question… eh? It took me nearly couple of minutes to even attempt giving an answer. I gave a semi-humorous answer, “maturity is maturity… the mature know it and never ask about it and the immature never attain it and keep asking about it” Well, that was a cunning way to escape.

Later, I thought and thought, finally to come up with a lucid explanation of the term maturity.

When we were kids, we wanted everything that people known and unknown to us owned. Later came the time, when we wanted only some things which our classmates possessed. As enough time went by, we at this stage, in early college life, wanted only those things which our selected friends had or desired for. Beyond this phase came the phase, in which you asked yourself, questions like. WHAT I REALLY WANT? WHY DO I WANT THIS?

Some people who successfully answered these questions, I classify them as matured people and the others, who have no answers to these questions and are continuing to participate in a blindfolded run even today, I hope they attain maturity, sometimes soon.

For me knowing, what you want, why you want it and in addition to that, how you get there, are the early signs of maturity.

Guidelines to maintain a Blog

My friend was appreciating me for having a blog and updating it fairly regularly. It’s no big deal to have a blog as any one can have it for free. So, I suggested her to maintain her own blog space. She refused to do so, sighting that maintaining a blog would reveal some part of her personal life to public. Well, that’s a good point, but if maintained with proper guidelines, a blog will reveal only those points, which are either informative or fun. The rest can be omitted. To, this she asked me to pen down certain informal guidelines which might motivate her to have her blog soon. Here they come, for my friend and many like her, who are avoiding having a blog space, considering that as an intrusion in your personal life.

Most people update blog for two main reasons:
• Communicate with readers (both known and strangers) and present them with some interesting stuff
• Express your ideas to the world

Well, that’s fair enough. To begin with, here is a list of NOT TO DO THINGS while writing on your blog:

1) Never ever mention somebody’s name, designation, organizations that they (or you) work for and their personal stuff (yes this rule should be applied to you as well as others known to you). Remember, your today’s enemy was your yesterday’s friend. And today’s enemy might turn out to be your co-worker, your boss or your friend, tomorrow. In general, badmouthing anyone is a very bad practice in itself.

2) If you have had a forgetful experience, avoid writing it. It could be a break-up, job loss, betrayal etc. Anything that goes in your blog, you might read it sometimes later, and these bad memories might haunt you then. Just omit this part, which will speed up the process to get over such bad experiences.

3) Avoid expressing your strong opinion on controversial topics. Remember again, any user on the web can navigate to your blog through Search Engines. Why invite enmity from unknown people

Now coming to THINGS TO DO:

1) Make use of the reverse pyramid idea, in which you discuss a point in broad at the beginning and narrow down to the crux of the matter and draw an obvious conclusion.

2) Try to give that personal touch by writing in first person.

3) Give various perspectives and sound a little pragmatic. Remember, anything that is doable and can be related to anyone’s life, catches more attention.

To conclude, I would say, stay sensible and make sure that reading your blog should either be informative or pleasure. Hope, after reading this article, you too, like my friend will have your own blog. Happy Blogging!!!