Only after the semester comes to an end, I have excess time to spare for my personal hobbies. Just like now. Making use of this excess time, I wrote down a story, based on an old adage, of course with some modification. Hope, readers enjoy reading it and learn from it too.
Long ago, in a village, a man was walking past his friend, who was climbing up a cocoanut tree. When he asked his friend about the reason for him to climb up the cocoanut tree, his friend said, “My cat has high fever and hence I’m climbing up the cocoanut tree to pluck some special grass, which will cure my cat”. Though each word from his friend appeared to be a lie, the man just gave an acknowledging smile and moved away.
Few days later, again while he was going past the same area, he again saw the same friend climbing up the cocoanut tree. Again he asked for the reason and got the same answer from his friend. This time he got furious and said, “Do you think, I’m a fool to take such words. I know the only reason you were climbing up the cocoanut tree was to steal some tender cocoanuts. Please don’t do it. It will harm you. You are stealing as well as lying. Shame on you!” To this his friend started making an illogical argument and started an emotional drama. Controlling his anger, the man left the place, with a smile.
Months later, again the same situation occurred. On enquiry this time around, his friend replied, “This time, it’s my goat which is suffering from high fever. I am climbing up to pluck the special grass which will cure my goat” Without uttering a word, the man left the place.
The friend was surprised by this action and went to a sage and asked him for an explanation for the man’s behavior on all three instances. The sage replied, “First time when you lied, your friend realized you were lying but ignored it, thinking there might be some reason behind your lies. When you lied to him for the second time, he felt you were mistaking his kindness with stupidity and he made it clear that he understood your lies. This time, he expected a lie from you and just ignored your words, and concluded you as a worthless person. When life gives you a chance to improve, use it wisely. But if you repeat your mistakes, you will lose your value. There is no way that your friend is ever going to trust you. Make sure you don’t repeat this kind of behavior with others.”
The moral of this story is obvious. I hope each one of follows the sage’s words in our lives, if we are not following them, before reading this story!
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Being Alone & Being Lonely!
This is quite a random thought, felt like posting it on my blog.
What's the difference in between being alone and being lonely?
Here is my simple explanation;
When I am away from people, I read a book, listen to my favorite music and of course study hard, I consider being alone!
When I am away from people, I feel like talking to someone close and start scrolling the address book of my phone, only to conclude, I have no one to talk to, I consider being lonely!
What's the difference in between being alone and being lonely?
Here is my simple explanation;
When I am away from people, I read a book, listen to my favorite music and of course study hard, I consider being alone!
When I am away from people, I feel like talking to someone close and start scrolling the address book of my phone, only to conclude, I have no one to talk to, I consider being lonely!
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Changing America!
For most of us, an American, in general is a spend-thrift who hardly believes in saving money. It is quite true, and if you have lived here for a while, you will realize that. But this American mindset is fast changing. Probably the phase from when I landed in this country till date has been the second worst time this country has seen (after the GREAT DEPRESSION), and hence I, like many others have been able to see this shift in attitude.
Today, in my campus, I got a note from a bunch of volunteers who want students to be more responsible than their previous generation. That note looked something like this…
HOLIDAYS ARE HERE AND WE HAVE SOME NOTES FOR YOU. CHECK THIS LIST TWICE BEFORE ENJOYING YOUR CHRISTMAS BREAK!
• Budget your holiday spending: Don’t buy what you can’t afford. Plan your budget and stick to it.
• Shop Wisely: Come up with ideas before you go shopping. Check out online for good deals and check if others are also interested in buying the same thing, so that you can get some bulk discount. Remember, a sale is good, only if you need a particular thing. Otherwise it can be a tempting trap.
• Pay by cash: With cash you can track your expenses better. Avoid credit cards which are the root cause for the rising debt-rate.
• Track your expenses: Track your expenses and items you want to buy. Neither buy excess number of items, nor exceed your overall budget.
For people who have been raised in India, these guidelines were rooted in them. Indians don’t require a special emphasis on being frugal. But with our country’s economy doing better than the most, I suspect if there is some need for distributing such guidelines. “We are doing well and so why should we be frugal in our approach”, best describes the attitude of our current generation. For those, here is some food for thought. If the USA, land of opportunities, with great economy, an open society and tremendously blessed with natural resources can burn its fingers by showing reckless attitude towards its expenditure, wouldn’t India take a bigger hit, if we imitate the reckless attitude in spending?
It is said that the wise learn from other’s mistakes while fools are inspired by other’s mistakes, to repeat it. Now it is up to us to prove ourselves, wise or otherwise!
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
The Gender Disparity
Recently, the Indian Air Force (IAF) made a statement, which was viewed as a controversial one by many. I heard a lot of people talk about it, read a lot of material and then felt that the statement which was issued was not as controversial as few of us made it out to be.
The statement implied that women are not well suited for direct combat roles in the IAF, especially in the role of fighter pilot. Well, to me it made no attack on women’s intellectual capabilities. Yes, it’s a fact that a woman’s physiology works against her in many walks of life. So, just to show equality, would it make sense to make an investment, which will not give the desired returns?
If someone asks me, are men and women equal? My answer is, ‘No’, though I am mindful of the fact that my mother and two sisters are women. I feel men and women are unique and should not be compared or contrasted. Comparing them would be like comparing apples and oranges. I am of the opinion, that it is more important to understand the differences between the two sexes and play the role which appropriately fits each one. To support my point, here are two quick examples…
In the game of Tennis, a men’s match can last for five sets, but a women’s match can utmost last for three sets. Would it be apt for women to play five sets, to claim equality? Or, can men look after a one day old infant, like women do? Well, let’s respect nature’s plot. We must acknowledge that men and women have their unique strengths and weaknesses. Why not play roles that suit our respective strengths instead of arguing for non-existent equality and become counterproductive.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Maturity… Explanation
Some questions are way too simple, yet to answer them remains a very hard task. Here is some food for thought. Someone recently asked me, “What is maturity?” Simple question… eh? It took me nearly couple of minutes to even attempt giving an answer. I gave a semi-humorous answer, “maturity is maturity… the mature know it and never ask about it and the immature never attain it and keep asking about it” Well, that was a cunning way to escape.
Later, I thought and thought, finally to come up with a lucid explanation of the term maturity.
When we were kids, we wanted everything that people known and unknown to us owned. Later came the time, when we wanted only some things which our classmates possessed. As enough time went by, we at this stage, in early college life, wanted only those things which our selected friends had or desired for. Beyond this phase came the phase, in which you asked yourself, questions like. WHAT I REALLY WANT? WHY DO I WANT THIS?
Some people who successfully answered these questions, I classify them as matured people and the others, who have no answers to these questions and are continuing to participate in a blindfolded run even today, I hope they attain maturity, sometimes soon.
For me knowing, what you want, why you want it and in addition to that, how you get there, are the early signs of maturity.
Later, I thought and thought, finally to come up with a lucid explanation of the term maturity.
When we were kids, we wanted everything that people known and unknown to us owned. Later came the time, when we wanted only some things which our classmates possessed. As enough time went by, we at this stage, in early college life, wanted only those things which our selected friends had or desired for. Beyond this phase came the phase, in which you asked yourself, questions like. WHAT I REALLY WANT? WHY DO I WANT THIS?
Some people who successfully answered these questions, I classify them as matured people and the others, who have no answers to these questions and are continuing to participate in a blindfolded run even today, I hope they attain maturity, sometimes soon.
For me knowing, what you want, why you want it and in addition to that, how you get there, are the early signs of maturity.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Guidelines to maintain a Blog
My friend was appreciating me for having a blog and updating it fairly regularly. It’s no big deal to have a blog as any one can have it for free. So, I suggested her to maintain her own blog space. She refused to do so, sighting that maintaining a blog would reveal some part of her personal life to public. Well, that’s a good point, but if maintained with proper guidelines, a blog will reveal only those points, which are either informative or fun. The rest can be omitted. To, this she asked me to pen down certain informal guidelines which might motivate her to have her blog soon. Here they come, for my friend and many like her, who are avoiding having a blog space, considering that as an intrusion in your personal life.
Most people update blog for two main reasons:
• Communicate with readers (both known and strangers) and present them with some interesting stuff
• Express your ideas to the world
Well, that’s fair enough. To begin with, here is a list of NOT TO DO THINGS while writing on your blog:
1) Never ever mention somebody’s name, designation, organizations that they (or you) work for and their personal stuff (yes this rule should be applied to you as well as others known to you). Remember, your today’s enemy was your yesterday’s friend. And today’s enemy might turn out to be your co-worker, your boss or your friend, tomorrow. In general, badmouthing anyone is a very bad practice in itself.
2) If you have had a forgetful experience, avoid writing it. It could be a break-up, job loss, betrayal etc. Anything that goes in your blog, you might read it sometimes later, and these bad memories might haunt you then. Just omit this part, which will speed up the process to get over such bad experiences.
3) Avoid expressing your strong opinion on controversial topics. Remember again, any user on the web can navigate to your blog through Search Engines. Why invite enmity from unknown people
Now coming to THINGS TO DO:
1) Make use of the reverse pyramid idea, in which you discuss a point in broad at the beginning and narrow down to the crux of the matter and draw an obvious conclusion.
2) Try to give that personal touch by writing in first person.
3) Give various perspectives and sound a little pragmatic. Remember, anything that is doable and can be related to anyone’s life, catches more attention.
To conclude, I would say, stay sensible and make sure that reading your blog should either be informative or pleasure. Hope, after reading this article, you too, like my friend will have your own blog. Happy Blogging!!!
Most people update blog for two main reasons:
• Communicate with readers (both known and strangers) and present them with some interesting stuff
• Express your ideas to the world
Well, that’s fair enough. To begin with, here is a list of NOT TO DO THINGS while writing on your blog:
1) Never ever mention somebody’s name, designation, organizations that they (or you) work for and their personal stuff (yes this rule should be applied to you as well as others known to you). Remember, your today’s enemy was your yesterday’s friend. And today’s enemy might turn out to be your co-worker, your boss or your friend, tomorrow. In general, badmouthing anyone is a very bad practice in itself.
2) If you have had a forgetful experience, avoid writing it. It could be a break-up, job loss, betrayal etc. Anything that goes in your blog, you might read it sometimes later, and these bad memories might haunt you then. Just omit this part, which will speed up the process to get over such bad experiences.
3) Avoid expressing your strong opinion on controversial topics. Remember again, any user on the web can navigate to your blog through Search Engines. Why invite enmity from unknown people
Now coming to THINGS TO DO:
1) Make use of the reverse pyramid idea, in which you discuss a point in broad at the beginning and narrow down to the crux of the matter and draw an obvious conclusion.
2) Try to give that personal touch by writing in first person.
3) Give various perspectives and sound a little pragmatic. Remember, anything that is doable and can be related to anyone’s life, catches more attention.
To conclude, I would say, stay sensible and make sure that reading your blog should either be informative or pleasure. Hope, after reading this article, you too, like my friend will have your own blog. Happy Blogging!!!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Better to Express than to Repent
Unlike my last few posts, this one is not based on current affairs or an article. The inspiration behind this post is a friend of mine, whose two experiences helped me understand a beautiful concept in life. Before you start reading this one, here is a quick background. This friend is in his mid-twenties, yet doesn’t have (never had) a girlfriend.
During his college days, he liked a girl. One day he decided to express it to her. He gave her a call and expressed his feelings. The girl denied it, as she already was in a relation with someone else. As a result of this, he was heart-broken for couple of weeks. Enough time passed and he was doing fine.
Life at times tests you beyond imaginations and throws again those tricky situations at you. It turned out that, he again liked a girl, a co-worker, years later. But this time, he played it safe. He never told her about his feelings. The girl whom he liked, eventually became his best friend at office. Again, enough time passed and one day this girl handed him her wedding invitation. This time too my friend was devastated. Now rose the doubt in his mind that had he expressed his feelings to this girl, things would have probably worked out. This doubt had no (will never have a fruitful) resolution.
When I last spoke to him, he confessed that earlier rejection was way better than suppressing the feelings. He is sure that his doubt will never allow him to be at peace. Just to avoid some embarrassment, he opted for a bigger punishment. Maybe it is okay to have the attitude “better safe than sorry” in most instances of life. But when it comes to the matters of heart, along with playing it safe, it is always better to express your feelings and lighten up than repent for not expressing.
I am signing off this post with a quote which I recently read, goes something like this, “Often you will repent more for those things that you didn’t do than those which you did”
PS: This post is dedicated to whomsoever it may concern.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Two Nobel Souls
Not even a week has gone by since the announcement of Nobel prizes in various fields for this year and each news paper has come up with its exciting piece of trivia about the winners. This has been followed by some interesting opinions from the common people as well.
This year’s two Nobel laureates who interested me the most are… yes you guessed it right!
• Venkatraman Ramakrishnan for Chemistry
• Barack Obama for peace.
Let’s start with Venky (as he is popularly known as). He shot to fame among a billion Indians just in one day. Every Indian was proud of him being Indian rather than an exceptional individual, in this field of work. In fact people further started crediting his success of him being born in a particular state or having studied in a particular state and so on. Let us get it straight. His achievement is phenomenal, but individual and has got nothing to do with his roots. Even he said that he believes more in people rather than nations. The bottom line is, such achievements are individual and not national and do little or no good to a country as such. Especially when someone represents an institution of other nation, it would be less apt to claim his credit on behalf of his roots. This reminds me of quote by another Nobel laureate, George B. Shaw. “Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it”
Now coming to Barack Obama, here is what I feel. The question that arises first is, does he actually deserve it? Well, that’s for the Nobel Committee to decide, as per Alfred Nobel’s will. But in general the opinion amongst most people is that he doesn’t. To a fair extent, he may not deserve it this time. Though he might have a lot of positive ideas, hardly any of his ideas have been comprehensively converted into actions in such a short time. Also, a Nobel peace prize for a country head, which has highest nuclear arsenal, is a little ironical. Or maybe like Nobel, who invented 'dynamite' and believed that it will never be used for destructive purposes, the committee is also hoping that Obama will never use any of the nuclear weapons that the US possesses.
Whatever it is, there is always some sort of controversy that surrounds a Nobel Prize. Who is the right person to win it, is always a debatable point. In spite of all this, Nobel Prize has its own importance. Thanks to Alfred Nobel, for creating such an interesting will, which serves as a great source of motivation to many. And this reminds of one more quote by George B. Shaw, which goes something like this. “I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a friend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize”
This year’s two Nobel laureates who interested me the most are… yes you guessed it right!
• Venkatraman Ramakrishnan for Chemistry
• Barack Obama for peace.
Let’s start with Venky (as he is popularly known as). He shot to fame among a billion Indians just in one day. Every Indian was proud of him being Indian rather than an exceptional individual, in this field of work. In fact people further started crediting his success of him being born in a particular state or having studied in a particular state and so on. Let us get it straight. His achievement is phenomenal, but individual and has got nothing to do with his roots. Even he said that he believes more in people rather than nations. The bottom line is, such achievements are individual and not national and do little or no good to a country as such. Especially when someone represents an institution of other nation, it would be less apt to claim his credit on behalf of his roots. This reminds me of quote by another Nobel laureate, George B. Shaw. “Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it”
Now coming to Barack Obama, here is what I feel. The question that arises first is, does he actually deserve it? Well, that’s for the Nobel Committee to decide, as per Alfred Nobel’s will. But in general the opinion amongst most people is that he doesn’t. To a fair extent, he may not deserve it this time. Though he might have a lot of positive ideas, hardly any of his ideas have been comprehensively converted into actions in such a short time. Also, a Nobel peace prize for a country head, which has highest nuclear arsenal, is a little ironical. Or maybe like Nobel, who invented 'dynamite' and believed that it will never be used for destructive purposes, the committee is also hoping that Obama will never use any of the nuclear weapons that the US possesses.
Whatever it is, there is always some sort of controversy that surrounds a Nobel Prize. Who is the right person to win it, is always a debatable point. In spite of all this, Nobel Prize has its own importance. Thanks to Alfred Nobel, for creating such an interesting will, which serves as a great source of motivation to many. And this reminds of one more quote by George B. Shaw, which goes something like this. “I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a friend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize”
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Women can’t keep secrets
The below article is borrowed from Bangalore Times, dated September 25, 2009. For all my friends, here on, give a second thought before sharing your secrets with any woman, be it your GF or your friend who is girl et al. Whatever be the case, a must read article, no matter whether you are a girl or guy!
Most women cannot keep a secret for more than 47 hours, a new survey has revealed. In the survey involving 3,000 women aged 18 to 65, four out of 10 respondents admitted that they cannot keep a secret, no matter how personal or embarrassing. While 83 per cent of women believe they are “completely trustworthy” and three in four claim they would never betray a confidence, it is unlikely that they keep their lips sealed. And their likely confidante is their husband, boyfriend, mother or best friend. Nearly 45 per cent said they blurt out secrets just to get it off their chests and then most of them feel guilty. More than half blamed alcohol for blurting out the secrets. “It’s official — women can’t keep secrets,” a daily quoted Michael Cox, UK director of the company that commissioned the research, as saying.
Women hear at least three nuggets of gossip in a week — about sex, affairs, guys in office, or how much so-and-so really spent on that handbag.“What we didn’t bank on was how quickly these are passed on. Everyone who has confided in a friend should be worried,” he added.
Most women cannot keep a secret for more than 47 hours, a new survey has revealed. In the survey involving 3,000 women aged 18 to 65, four out of 10 respondents admitted that they cannot keep a secret, no matter how personal or embarrassing. While 83 per cent of women believe they are “completely trustworthy” and three in four claim they would never betray a confidence, it is unlikely that they keep their lips sealed. And their likely confidante is their husband, boyfriend, mother or best friend. Nearly 45 per cent said they blurt out secrets just to get it off their chests and then most of them feel guilty. More than half blamed alcohol for blurting out the secrets. “It’s official — women can’t keep secrets,” a daily quoted Michael Cox, UK director of the company that commissioned the research, as saying.
Women hear at least three nuggets of gossip in a week — about sex, affairs, guys in office, or how much so-and-so really spent on that handbag.“What we didn’t bank on was how quickly these are passed on. Everyone who has confided in a friend should be worried,” he added.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Evolution
It’s an age old phenomenon that human beings evolve with time. But why did I choose to write about this topic, which probably would be a little weird. Well, experience is something, which I feel is unique and is always first-hand, even if something has been done a million times by others and you are doing it for the first time.
This is what prompted me write on evolution. I have been an avid user of Gmail (for beginners, it is Google’s email service) from January 2006. One of the features I love the most is that the storage is virtually unlimited and one doesn’t need to delete any mails. After a long and tiring day, around 2:00 AM last night (or is it morning?) I did this exercise. I started reading mails at random, beginning with the first mail that I had received in January 2006 till date. I observed that…
• My way of writing mails had changed dramatically
• My vocabulary was more or less in the same lines, but usage of certain words had changed considerably
• Few things which were my dreams had become a thing of past while some seemed really silly
• Last, but not the least, some mysteries did uncover, based upon the mails few people had written to what actions took place in reality
Maybe, few years down the line when I again undertake the same exercise, today’s action might seem silly. What I am not even thinking remotely about today, may become my biggest dream.
If you have not tried this exercise (and have some excess time), I strongly recommend you to do so. Most certainly you will realize how your personality has evolved with time!
This is what prompted me write on evolution. I have been an avid user of Gmail (for beginners, it is Google’s email service) from January 2006. One of the features I love the most is that the storage is virtually unlimited and one doesn’t need to delete any mails. After a long and tiring day, around 2:00 AM last night (or is it morning?) I did this exercise. I started reading mails at random, beginning with the first mail that I had received in January 2006 till date. I observed that…
• My way of writing mails had changed dramatically
• My vocabulary was more or less in the same lines, but usage of certain words had changed considerably
• Few things which were my dreams had become a thing of past while some seemed really silly
• Last, but not the least, some mysteries did uncover, based upon the mails few people had written to what actions took place in reality
Maybe, few years down the line when I again undertake the same exercise, today’s action might seem silly. What I am not even thinking remotely about today, may become my biggest dream.
If you have not tried this exercise (and have some excess time), I strongly recommend you to do so. Most certainly you will realize how your personality has evolved with time!
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Midlife Crisis!
Please note that this article has been borrowed from an online article. And the target audience is a handful of people! A good friend suggested me to read this article. God knows why? A nice read though!
What the Hell is a Midlife Crisis?
Justice Stewart's wisdom about pornography applies to midlife, too: tough to define, but you know it when you're in it. Men in the muddle often use words such as "aimless," "confused," "lost." Previously surefooted guys come to question things in which they once believed -- marriage, work, friendships. Some men report losing their vitality, their joy in things they used to savor. In the book Flyfishing through the Midlife Crisis, the New York Times executive editor Howell Raines describes this feeling as "disappointment and restlessness that tiptoe in on little cat feet."
Here's a symptom sampler: insomnia, fatigue, despair, morbidity, inability to concentrate, ruefulness about roads not taken, dread that life holds no more surprises, regrets, sharp longing for something (a gunmetal Porsche, a cigarette boat) or someone (the FedEx woman, Gina, whose smile is a promise of overnight delivery). Men in crisis often obsess about big questions, as in, "Does my life matter?"
"Many men start to think in terms of how little time they have left," says James. In severe cases, men fantasize about just lighting out, shucking off their old lives and starting over in the South Pacific or the Sawtooth Range. At 36, the world's our oyster, but by 44, we're trapped inside the oyster, gasping for air.
The midlife stew often starts with some garden-variety boredom. If you've been hoeing the same row for 20 years, only an idiot wouldn't wonder if there aren't some more interesting rows somewhere else. On top of tedium, we often get our first bolt of serious bad news: the death of a parent, trouble in a marriage, a career setback, the transformation of the 8-year-old who thought you were God into the adolescent who thinks you're the devil. Crushing chest pain and the word "biopsy" can set a fellow to thinking about what he's done with this life.
Often, come our 40s, some undeniable facts start eroding the dubious pillars on which we've built our notion of a man.
What the Hell is a Midlife Crisis?
Justice Stewart's wisdom about pornography applies to midlife, too: tough to define, but you know it when you're in it. Men in the muddle often use words such as "aimless," "confused," "lost." Previously surefooted guys come to question things in which they once believed -- marriage, work, friendships. Some men report losing their vitality, their joy in things they used to savor. In the book Flyfishing through the Midlife Crisis, the New York Times executive editor Howell Raines describes this feeling as "disappointment and restlessness that tiptoe in on little cat feet."
Here's a symptom sampler: insomnia, fatigue, despair, morbidity, inability to concentrate, ruefulness about roads not taken, dread that life holds no more surprises, regrets, sharp longing for something (a gunmetal Porsche, a cigarette boat) or someone (the FedEx woman, Gina, whose smile is a promise of overnight delivery). Men in crisis often obsess about big questions, as in, "Does my life matter?"
"Many men start to think in terms of how little time they have left," says James. In severe cases, men fantasize about just lighting out, shucking off their old lives and starting over in the South Pacific or the Sawtooth Range. At 36, the world's our oyster, but by 44, we're trapped inside the oyster, gasping for air.
The midlife stew often starts with some garden-variety boredom. If you've been hoeing the same row for 20 years, only an idiot wouldn't wonder if there aren't some more interesting rows somewhere else. On top of tedium, we often get our first bolt of serious bad news: the death of a parent, trouble in a marriage, a career setback, the transformation of the 8-year-old who thought you were God into the adolescent who thinks you're the devil. Crushing chest pain and the word "biopsy" can set a fellow to thinking about what he's done with this life.
Often, come our 40s, some undeniable facts start eroding the dubious pillars on which we've built our notion of a man.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Time to get back!
After having spent just over 3 months back home, it’s time to get back to place where I started off from. And now is when I realize that 3 months, just over 90 days is too small a period. On such instances I’m reminded of the famous example cited by the great Albert Einstein to explain his theory of relativity, “If you sit on a gas stove for 2 minutes, those 2 minutes will be felt like two hours and if you have a conversation with a beautiful lady for two hours, those two hours will be felt like 2 minutes” (I can vouch for the later statement... I did experience it on a couple of junctures)
I realize that these times are filled with nostalgia and it would be apt to compare my present state of mind with the one, just over an year ago, when I left for the first time. Then, I had mixed feeling of excitement, nervousness and expectations. Now, it’s almost that the stage is set and I need to stick to my plans. There is little element of surprise left, which should ideally make things easy. But as they say, surprises can occur at any point in time, especially when you already are in a system and tend to anticipate things. So, again I am prepared for some surprises (rather shocks) and new challenges that I might have to face. Whatever is the case, I know one thing for sure, life is not going to be as flowery as it has been during these 3 months. The chivalry that I rediscovered in me (courtesy, my mom and few other noble souls) will soon be lost. The comforts and luxuries are definitely going to be a thing of past. In spite of all this, I’m looking forward for getting back.
During three months, I had my own highs and lows.
Some of the highs were:
• Meeting some of favorite people on a regular basis and those endless conversations
• Food (ask anyone away from home, the importance of homemade food. I gained over 5 pounds)
• Relaxation and Travel
Lows, I would like to mention a little softly:
• Disappointment and Differences (Many people left me disappointed. The root cause was 'over expectations' and inability to adapt to changing times I would say. I feel, I have learned some tricks to handle this in future)
• Troubled health (Ha! I had no control over this, but still would have preferred to be in the pink of my health all the time. It cut short my plans of meeting people and spending quality time)
All said and done, still I don’t know how things are going to be, a week from now. Well, that’s the beauty of life. No one can perfectly guess what’s stored in future!
PS: Thanks to you people, for making me feel special during these three months. I have missed you in the past and am surely going to miss you again, hopefully for not too long :)
I realize that these times are filled with nostalgia and it would be apt to compare my present state of mind with the one, just over an year ago, when I left for the first time. Then, I had mixed feeling of excitement, nervousness and expectations. Now, it’s almost that the stage is set and I need to stick to my plans. There is little element of surprise left, which should ideally make things easy. But as they say, surprises can occur at any point in time, especially when you already are in a system and tend to anticipate things. So, again I am prepared for some surprises (rather shocks) and new challenges that I might have to face. Whatever is the case, I know one thing for sure, life is not going to be as flowery as it has been during these 3 months. The chivalry that I rediscovered in me (courtesy, my mom and few other noble souls) will soon be lost. The comforts and luxuries are definitely going to be a thing of past. In spite of all this, I’m looking forward for getting back.
During three months, I had my own highs and lows.
Some of the highs were:
• Meeting some of favorite people on a regular basis and those endless conversations
• Food (ask anyone away from home, the importance of homemade food. I gained over 5 pounds)
• Relaxation and Travel
Lows, I would like to mention a little softly:
• Disappointment and Differences (Many people left me disappointed. The root cause was 'over expectations' and inability to adapt to changing times I would say. I feel, I have learned some tricks to handle this in future)
• Troubled health (Ha! I had no control over this, but still would have preferred to be in the pink of my health all the time. It cut short my plans of meeting people and spending quality time)
All said and done, still I don’t know how things are going to be, a week from now. Well, that’s the beauty of life. No one can perfectly guess what’s stored in future!
PS: Thanks to you people, for making me feel special during these three months. I have missed you in the past and am surely going to miss you again, hopefully for not too long :)
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Time Locked
It’s been a while since I returned from foreign land. And before getting back, I spent a fair amount of time away from home. I had always seen people complaining of bad infrastructure, overcrowded roads et al, once back from the west. Honestly speaking I never felt that way. But I did face some other problem. This one was subtle and hard to explain, I must admit.
When I came back, I had the same image of Bangalore, which I had seen nearly an year ago. However that was not the case. It was little hard to imagine this city undergoing some minor or major restructuring. Be it the signal free road to the new airport or badly damaged CMH road (due to construction work of Metro Rail), it was little hard to adjust. However any city goes through transition and one has to keep moving, keeping this thought in mind. After all one year isn’t that small a time frame.
I also observed this phenomenon in some other instances as well. Most of my conversations with my friends were either based upon incidents that took place over an year ago, or in the past couple of months. Last one year has become a big void and I doubt whether I would be able to fill it or not.
More hurting was to see a few people change, and change for worse in this time. Some, who were most trusted have been acting like strangers while some strangers have become good friends. Is the time lock responsible for this as well? Maybe yes or maybe not! Well that’s the way it has been so far. All I hope for, is I don’t experience this time lock factor once I get back to US. Because my mind would have the image of Athens, about 3 months back. Again 3 months isn’t that small a time frame for people to change. It's the ability to adapt to changing times and behavior, which is very crucial for us to come out of this time lock.
When I came back, I had the same image of Bangalore, which I had seen nearly an year ago. However that was not the case. It was little hard to imagine this city undergoing some minor or major restructuring. Be it the signal free road to the new airport or badly damaged CMH road (due to construction work of Metro Rail), it was little hard to adjust. However any city goes through transition and one has to keep moving, keeping this thought in mind. After all one year isn’t that small a time frame.
I also observed this phenomenon in some other instances as well. Most of my conversations with my friends were either based upon incidents that took place over an year ago, or in the past couple of months. Last one year has become a big void and I doubt whether I would be able to fill it or not.
More hurting was to see a few people change, and change for worse in this time. Some, who were most trusted have been acting like strangers while some strangers have become good friends. Is the time lock responsible for this as well? Maybe yes or maybe not! Well that’s the way it has been so far. All I hope for, is I don’t experience this time lock factor once I get back to US. Because my mind would have the image of Athens, about 3 months back. Again 3 months isn’t that small a time frame for people to change. It's the ability to adapt to changing times and behavior, which is very crucial for us to come out of this time lock.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Truth be told...
I have been waiting to share this with my readers, for a while, but something or the other has kept me occupied for over a month. I came out with this writing to illustrate the three incidences that I recently experienced. Please don’t ask me about these three experiences, as few experiences are better left unshared. But I won’t keep you in total darkness. So here is the after-effect of all the three incidents. Each one a different one, but effect has been more or less the same.
In the first case, I was deeply hurt by someone’s words. In the second one I was again deeply hurt by someone’s actions. In the third one someone was deeply hurt by my words. What were people hurt for, in all these three cases? While I was giving it a deep thought I remembered a short story which I had read as a 12 year old. Nearly 14 years later, I’m compelled to share the same story with you. The story goes something like this…
Long, Long ago, in Greece there lived a king Andrew. He was known both as a kind-heart as well as a brave-heart. Along with these two good qualities, he was known for his wisdom and ability to deliver justice on all instances. Naturally he was very popular and loved by the people.
Andrew also had good relations with rulers of neighboring kingdom and ensured their complete entertainment when they came by to his province. This was one such occasion when king Cosmos came for a two day visit. Andrew gave him no opportunity to complain about any possible inconvenience. After meals and the dance program (as there were no other ways of entertainment back then) the king presented him one of the best shows. This show was the most talked-about by all the visitors, the buffoon’s comedy show.
During the course of this show, the buffoon played various tricks and used his humorous words to keep the crowed spellbound. But in doing so, there were several instances when the buffoon crossed his limits, which also took king Cosmos by surprise. For example, the buffoon once called king Andrew ‘incapable’ and further said, “had the king been really capable, he would have entertained his guests himself and not used a wise person like myself, instead”. The joke made Andrew along with crowed burst into laughter. Cosmos even asked Andrew, “How could you laugh at such a joke?” To this he said, “Look my friend, it is humor. One should have enough sense of humor and take things in a sporting manner”. After some time, the buffoon called the king as a person with ‘dull voice’, which was exactly the opposite. By now Cosmos had got a hang of this kinda humor and without raising any eyebrows he joined others in laughing. Later, the buffoon who stood as tall as 4ft 8 inches claimed that Andrew was shorter than him and challenged Andrew to stand next to him to prove him otherwise.
Things went on in the same way, with the buffoon cracking jokes on the king, his ministers and several others present there, until he called Andrew a ‘bald’ man. To this Andrew got extremely wild, cancelled the show and ordered the buffoon’s arrest. Everyone was taken by surprise as to why the king was unusually angry. Andrew decided to hang the buffoon after 3 days.
One the last day the Andrew visited the buffoon and asked him, if he had any last wish left. The buffoon said, “Your highness, before I die, I would like to know my mistake, for which I’m being hanged. I called you incapable, you didn’t mind it. I called you a person with dull voice, you didn’t mind it. I called you a short man, you didn’t mind it. I cracked several other jokes on you, your ministers and your guests, but you never objected. But when I called you bald, why you got so wild at me” Andrew paused for a while and said, “Whatever you said earlier about me was untrue except that I’m in fact bald. Though you spoke in a humorous manner, your calling me bald poked my ego. This truth was too bitter for me to handle.” The buffoon interrupted and said, “Your highness, you are known for delivering justice and hanging someone for hurting you unintentionally, justice will not be done! Please reconsider your decision” Andrew thought for a while and said, “I will excuse you. Promise me, not only in my case, but in any case, if you get to know about someone’s weaknesses, though it is undeniably real, never mention such points, even unintentionally. It can leave any person upset forever” Saying this, he again reinstated the buffoon as the official entertainer of the kingdom.
What moral I learned from this short story was… Truth is a subtle weapon, which can at times make a person happy and make the same person unhappy on different instances. Before speaking out truth, one has to evaluate the situation and then speak. Remember, some things are better left unsaid.
In the three incidents I mentioned earlier, I felt… the person who hurt me, pointed out one of weaknesses, which exists in me. In the second incidence, I caught a person, who at that moment was one of my most trusted, lying. I want to believe that lie turn out to be true, but truth was just too bitter. In the last incidence, my words, some intentional and some unintentional, hurt another person, close to me. I’m guessing I unnecessarily mentioned some incidents in which that person was wrong and claimed to be correct. May be I shouldn’t have done that!
That perhaps is the reason phrases such as bitter truth and harsh reality have been more popular than sweet truth and soft reality in our society.
In the first case, I was deeply hurt by someone’s words. In the second one I was again deeply hurt by someone’s actions. In the third one someone was deeply hurt by my words. What were people hurt for, in all these three cases? While I was giving it a deep thought I remembered a short story which I had read as a 12 year old. Nearly 14 years later, I’m compelled to share the same story with you. The story goes something like this…
Long, Long ago, in Greece there lived a king Andrew. He was known both as a kind-heart as well as a brave-heart. Along with these two good qualities, he was known for his wisdom and ability to deliver justice on all instances. Naturally he was very popular and loved by the people.
Andrew also had good relations with rulers of neighboring kingdom and ensured their complete entertainment when they came by to his province. This was one such occasion when king Cosmos came for a two day visit. Andrew gave him no opportunity to complain about any possible inconvenience. After meals and the dance program (as there were no other ways of entertainment back then) the king presented him one of the best shows. This show was the most talked-about by all the visitors, the buffoon’s comedy show.
During the course of this show, the buffoon played various tricks and used his humorous words to keep the crowed spellbound. But in doing so, there were several instances when the buffoon crossed his limits, which also took king Cosmos by surprise. For example, the buffoon once called king Andrew ‘incapable’ and further said, “had the king been really capable, he would have entertained his guests himself and not used a wise person like myself, instead”. The joke made Andrew along with crowed burst into laughter. Cosmos even asked Andrew, “How could you laugh at such a joke?” To this he said, “Look my friend, it is humor. One should have enough sense of humor and take things in a sporting manner”. After some time, the buffoon called the king as a person with ‘dull voice’, which was exactly the opposite. By now Cosmos had got a hang of this kinda humor and without raising any eyebrows he joined others in laughing. Later, the buffoon who stood as tall as 4ft 8 inches claimed that Andrew was shorter than him and challenged Andrew to stand next to him to prove him otherwise.
Things went on in the same way, with the buffoon cracking jokes on the king, his ministers and several others present there, until he called Andrew a ‘bald’ man. To this Andrew got extremely wild, cancelled the show and ordered the buffoon’s arrest. Everyone was taken by surprise as to why the king was unusually angry. Andrew decided to hang the buffoon after 3 days.
One the last day the Andrew visited the buffoon and asked him, if he had any last wish left. The buffoon said, “Your highness, before I die, I would like to know my mistake, for which I’m being hanged. I called you incapable, you didn’t mind it. I called you a person with dull voice, you didn’t mind it. I called you a short man, you didn’t mind it. I cracked several other jokes on you, your ministers and your guests, but you never objected. But when I called you bald, why you got so wild at me” Andrew paused for a while and said, “Whatever you said earlier about me was untrue except that I’m in fact bald. Though you spoke in a humorous manner, your calling me bald poked my ego. This truth was too bitter for me to handle.” The buffoon interrupted and said, “Your highness, you are known for delivering justice and hanging someone for hurting you unintentionally, justice will not be done! Please reconsider your decision” Andrew thought for a while and said, “I will excuse you. Promise me, not only in my case, but in any case, if you get to know about someone’s weaknesses, though it is undeniably real, never mention such points, even unintentionally. It can leave any person upset forever” Saying this, he again reinstated the buffoon as the official entertainer of the kingdom.
What moral I learned from this short story was… Truth is a subtle weapon, which can at times make a person happy and make the same person unhappy on different instances. Before speaking out truth, one has to evaluate the situation and then speak. Remember, some things are better left unsaid.
In the three incidents I mentioned earlier, I felt… the person who hurt me, pointed out one of weaknesses, which exists in me. In the second incidence, I caught a person, who at that moment was one of my most trusted, lying. I want to believe that lie turn out to be true, but truth was just too bitter. In the last incidence, my words, some intentional and some unintentional, hurt another person, close to me. I’m guessing I unnecessarily mentioned some incidents in which that person was wrong and claimed to be correct. May be I shouldn’t have done that!
That perhaps is the reason phrases such as bitter truth and harsh reality have been more popular than sweet truth and soft reality in our society.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Dummies Guide for: How to develop and maintain long-lasting relations?
In today’s world a lot is discussed about the complicated life, the true pursuit-of-happiness and the anguish of distancing from the own people. But such discussions often take place in between friends at a bar over the weekends and are often forgotten. But I feel it is very important for one to understand some of the essentials of developing and maintaining long-lasting relations. So, these are some of the points I chalked out and trust you not only enjoy reading this post, but also benefit from it…
1) The 3 C’s:
I have always advocated the importance of 3 C’s in any relation. Communication, Commitment and Compassion are not only most desired, but also most essential attributes of a healthy relation. Reach out to your near & dear ones and maintain a proper communication. It’s only the lack of communication that causes misunderstandings and widens the gap. To keep communication going strong, one needs to have a strong commitment. Recollect the instances when we require a person’s help with whom, we have not been in touch for a while; don’t we make an earnest effort to reach out that person. Compassion is an integral part of human life. The simple trick to follow compassion is to treat the other person, as you want the other person to treat you.
2) Synchronization:
In this techie world, this word can often be mistaken to the conceptual part of the Operating system. As it is essential in a computer’s OS, it is as much essential in human relations. I would like to give you a small work out. Think for couple minutes and try to recollect your 10 favorite people in your life (which could include your family members, friends, crushes et al). Time’s up… continue reading further. Okay, so let me explain how synchronization works in this case. If you recollected the names of your family members, it is quite natural. You would have spent a great deal of time with them and obviously there developed a strong bond. If you recollected your friend’s or your crush’s name, he/she would have been a person at your school, college, your neighbor, your colleague et al. Realize that under compulsory circumstances you spent enough time with these people and on similar topics. That is what has bonded you with them. To give you a deeper insight; in your college days, your best friend was from your section rather than other (in general). At your work place your favorite colleague is the one who has at some point in time been your team member. So, one needs this compulsory synchronization to come close to other and similar strategy to keep the relation going stronger.
3) Social Intelligence:
This term means the ability of understanding the needs that evolve in any relation. As humans, everyone is self-centered. To put it down bluntly, today’s life is a real bitch and every one is playing a pimp's role. So, people have to focus only and only on themselves. Well, this said and done, but without others help, certain things cannot co-exist. We are all social animals and cannot do everything alone. You never know which person you might need in your crunch time. Therefore, even if you have self interest in every action, for that to work well in your favor, one needs to do his/her homework. This homework is a bit complex, but can be rewarding beyond thoughts. Always try to remain in good books of people. For this, be a good listener and deliver what your promise. This builds trust and your next goal should be to retain it. If you cannot do that make sure you don’t over-promise and under-deliver. Say no, if you cannot and say yes, only if you can.
4) Attitude:
The golden phrase that describes the importance of attitude in human relations is, “Words at times can harm, but attitude seldom fails to heal.” Apologize when you screw up. All this takes is to give up that extra bit of ego. Understand the importance of people versus things. It is essential to make sacrifices for our near & dear ones when there is a situation of people over things. Any non-living thing is not irreplaceable, but some people are.
Last but not the least I would like to include one more secret, which is very hard to practice. Infinite-patience. Be considerate and overlook the shortcomings. Focus on positives and ignore negatives in a person. Remember, no one is pure evil. Essentially one needs to be magnanimous for a relation to remain stronger.
To end this post, I choose to borrow the concluding line from the Hindu epic, Gita, “To action alone hast thou a right and never at all to its fruits; let not the fruits of action be thy motive; neither let there be in thee any attachment to inaction”
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Minority Report
Well, I'm writing neither about the Tom Cruise starrer movie nor about the religious minorities which are discussed only during the election in our country.
Here, I’m uploading an article on a particular minority, which never gets its deserving share in any subject matter. It's written by one of the most prolific modern day writers, Aravind Adiga. Since I too belong to this category, I felt a kinda compulsion to upload this one. Hope you enjoy reading it!
Bachelor bigotry
- By Aravind Adiga
Shabana Azmi, an Indian actor, recently kicked up a stir by claiming that Muslims cannot easily buy homes in Mumbai. This may well be true: but as someone who recently looked for a place to rent in the city, I assure Azmi that there is a category of person even less wanted in this city than the Muslim. I belong to this category.
Mumbai's real-estate market suffers from a perpetual shortage of good, affordable housing. Landlords are picky. The lack of any real anti-discrimination law in the city means that the rental market is a bigot's paradise. Some landlords rent only to non-Muslims; some turn down Hindus; some permit only vegetarians in their flats. But almost none of them will gladly rent to a bachelor.
In the rest of the world, unmarried men are called by their proper, varied names – singleton, gay, divorced, celibate – but Indian society still lumps them into one Victorian-era category: the bachelor. And the landlords of Mumbai want nothing to do with this fellow. Where the bachelor lives, there the orgy follows; this is the great fear. In the landlord's imagination, half-clad women appear and disappear all day long through the bachelor's door; gasps of illicit pleasure rent the middle-class composure of the building; disgrace and scandal follow. Interestingly, the unmarried woman is not regarded as a sexually depraved type, and many landlords are prepared to rent to them. It is only the bachelor who is taboo.
Like so many of the stereotypes cherished by Indians, this one needs to go. All the unmarried men I know are hard at work – on a screenplay, a novel, or trying to find a wife. It's the fellows with the wedding rings, I notice, who get up to the debauchery. But even in India's most liberal city, old attitudes are surprisingly resilient.
I spent a week looking for places – and got told the same thing every time I liked a flat. Even if the landlord was bachelor-tolerant, he was helpless; many of Mumbai's buildings have rules that explicitly forbid unmarried men from renting or buying apartments. Especially my kind of unmarried man. Three species of bachelors inhabit Mumbai, it turns out. First comes the "company bachelor" – the fellow who works for American Express or another multinational; most landlords will take him on, grudgingly. Lower down the real-estate food chain is the "married bachelor" – who is living alone, but has a wife in Canada (or so he says). Last comes the "single bachelor" – no company job, no wife in Canada. This is me. Making things worse is that I describe myself as a "writer", a category that doesn't mean anything to the landlords of Mumbai; any young man sitting in front of a computer and typing all day must be playing games of some kind. Instead of doing solid, virtuous things like looking for a wife.
In Versova, a beach suburb in the far north of the city, I saw a second-floor sea-facing apartment with large glass windows. The waves came almost to the foot of the building. I imagined myself here, at a table, drawing energy from the ocean and hammering away on a Remington: I could turn out a hundred pages a day here – I could write a Les Miserables in a year.
"Just one question," the landlady said on the day we were to sign the lease. "When is your wife coming to join you?"
I explained; she stopped smiling.
"The last tenant was a married bachelor," she said. "He had a wife in Delhi, but he lived alone in this flat. And guess what he was doing here?"
"Tell me," I said, my heart sinking.
"He was familiar with young ladies."
"You don't say."
"And he was coolly running a brothel service. In this very flat."
The waves at Versova will never beat near my Remington. Some other writer will finish his Les Miserables in that flat – with his wife looking over his shoulder.
After two weeks of hunting, I did find a place – at a price far below what I was prepared to pay, and in a part of town with too much noise and pollution. I'd like to get out of here in a few months, but where can a bachelor go? A cousin of mine suggests that there is only one solution: marriage. Otherwise I should just pack up and move to Bangalore. He's probably right. I love Mumbai, but my time here may be drawing to an end. This city's not for bachelors.
I'm not sure whether Adiga's conclusion that Bangalore is a better city than Mumbai for bachelors is accurate or not!
Here, I’m uploading an article on a particular minority, which never gets its deserving share in any subject matter. It's written by one of the most prolific modern day writers, Aravind Adiga. Since I too belong to this category, I felt a kinda compulsion to upload this one. Hope you enjoy reading it!
Bachelor bigotry
- By Aravind Adiga
Shabana Azmi, an Indian actor, recently kicked up a stir by claiming that Muslims cannot easily buy homes in Mumbai. This may well be true: but as someone who recently looked for a place to rent in the city, I assure Azmi that there is a category of person even less wanted in this city than the Muslim. I belong to this category.
Mumbai's real-estate market suffers from a perpetual shortage of good, affordable housing. Landlords are picky. The lack of any real anti-discrimination law in the city means that the rental market is a bigot's paradise. Some landlords rent only to non-Muslims; some turn down Hindus; some permit only vegetarians in their flats. But almost none of them will gladly rent to a bachelor.
In the rest of the world, unmarried men are called by their proper, varied names – singleton, gay, divorced, celibate – but Indian society still lumps them into one Victorian-era category: the bachelor. And the landlords of Mumbai want nothing to do with this fellow. Where the bachelor lives, there the orgy follows; this is the great fear. In the landlord's imagination, half-clad women appear and disappear all day long through the bachelor's door; gasps of illicit pleasure rent the middle-class composure of the building; disgrace and scandal follow. Interestingly, the unmarried woman is not regarded as a sexually depraved type, and many landlords are prepared to rent to them. It is only the bachelor who is taboo.
Like so many of the stereotypes cherished by Indians, this one needs to go. All the unmarried men I know are hard at work – on a screenplay, a novel, or trying to find a wife. It's the fellows with the wedding rings, I notice, who get up to the debauchery. But even in India's most liberal city, old attitudes are surprisingly resilient.
I spent a week looking for places – and got told the same thing every time I liked a flat. Even if the landlord was bachelor-tolerant, he was helpless; many of Mumbai's buildings have rules that explicitly forbid unmarried men from renting or buying apartments. Especially my kind of unmarried man. Three species of bachelors inhabit Mumbai, it turns out. First comes the "company bachelor" – the fellow who works for American Express or another multinational; most landlords will take him on, grudgingly. Lower down the real-estate food chain is the "married bachelor" – who is living alone, but has a wife in Canada (or so he says). Last comes the "single bachelor" – no company job, no wife in Canada. This is me. Making things worse is that I describe myself as a "writer", a category that doesn't mean anything to the landlords of Mumbai; any young man sitting in front of a computer and typing all day must be playing games of some kind. Instead of doing solid, virtuous things like looking for a wife.
In Versova, a beach suburb in the far north of the city, I saw a second-floor sea-facing apartment with large glass windows. The waves came almost to the foot of the building. I imagined myself here, at a table, drawing energy from the ocean and hammering away on a Remington: I could turn out a hundred pages a day here – I could write a Les Miserables in a year.
"Just one question," the landlady said on the day we were to sign the lease. "When is your wife coming to join you?"
I explained; she stopped smiling.
"The last tenant was a married bachelor," she said. "He had a wife in Delhi, but he lived alone in this flat. And guess what he was doing here?"
"Tell me," I said, my heart sinking.
"He was familiar with young ladies."
"You don't say."
"And he was coolly running a brothel service. In this very flat."
The waves at Versova will never beat near my Remington. Some other writer will finish his Les Miserables in that flat – with his wife looking over his shoulder.
After two weeks of hunting, I did find a place – at a price far below what I was prepared to pay, and in a part of town with too much noise and pollution. I'd like to get out of here in a few months, but where can a bachelor go? A cousin of mine suggests that there is only one solution: marriage. Otherwise I should just pack up and move to Bangalore. He's probably right. I love Mumbai, but my time here may be drawing to an end. This city's not for bachelors.
I'm not sure whether Adiga's conclusion that Bangalore is a better city than Mumbai for bachelors is accurate or not!
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
The Father, the Son and the Donkey!
This writing is not my original work, unlike most of my previous ones. I’m writing, in fact re-writing a story, which I learned as a lesson in one of the languages that I studied in my third grade. I’ve been a big fan of this story and I have not only led my life by the teachings of this one, but have also recommended it to many of my friends. May be if you have known me well enough, you might probably have heard this from me sometimes. Another reason I am writing this story here is because I felt it was inapt to study this lesson at that age. People would find it practically beneficial when they go past 20. So, the story goes something like this…
Once, a father and his son go to a market to buy a donkey. They reach this market walking nearly 40 miles from their hometown. Once they purchase a donkey, they decide to use the donkey as the mode of transport and start riding back home. One their way, most of the people who come across them criticize the father-son duo for treating the donkey without compassion and for overburdening it. So, after riding for 10 miles they decide, they will walk the remaining distance along with the donkey. After having walked a distance of another 10 miles, they recollect that people this time had called the duo foolish for not making appropriate use of the available resource. Then the father realizes that their earlier choices were wrong and asks his son to ride on the donkey and he decides to walk along with them. People this time criticize the son for being selfish and insensitive to father’s needs. So, another 10 miles later, now it becomes the father’s turn to ride on the donkey and the son’s turn to walk along with them. This time the father faces severe criticism for being selfish and not caring about his young son. Now they get puzzled as to what might be the appropriate combination to opt for as all the combinations, duo riding the donkey, the duo walking along with the donkey, the son riding the donkey while father walks and the father rides the donkey while the son walks, had exhausted.
It was at this point in time when they were yet to travel a distance of 6 more miles; they come across a sage and consult him for his advice. The sage listens to the entire episode and gives a quite chuckle before he speaks. He asks them, “Having tried all the options did you both avoid criticism. No! So, what you must do… is a very simple option, if you answer this question.” Eagerly the father-son duo says “Yes”. The sage asks them, “Among all the options which one did you find the most convenient?” Both of them reply in unison, “The first option, when both of us were riding on the donkey”. “Then what is the need to be confused! Just do that. But remember, you have wasted 60% of journey, by trying to avoid criticism from the public. Had you not cared about it, by now you would have reached your destination happily”
Bitter truth is that many of us continue to waste 60% of our lives bowing to criticism from the public and end up doing what is NOT convenient to us. May be all of us should follow the sage’s advice in each and every step of our life. Because the choice is simple; Put yourself in discomfort, there will be criticism. Make yourself comfortable, there will be criticism. Why not go for the second option when we are sure of not being able to avoid criticism?
Once, a father and his son go to a market to buy a donkey. They reach this market walking nearly 40 miles from their hometown. Once they purchase a donkey, they decide to use the donkey as the mode of transport and start riding back home. One their way, most of the people who come across them criticize the father-son duo for treating the donkey without compassion and for overburdening it. So, after riding for 10 miles they decide, they will walk the remaining distance along with the donkey. After having walked a distance of another 10 miles, they recollect that people this time had called the duo foolish for not making appropriate use of the available resource. Then the father realizes that their earlier choices were wrong and asks his son to ride on the donkey and he decides to walk along with them. People this time criticize the son for being selfish and insensitive to father’s needs. So, another 10 miles later, now it becomes the father’s turn to ride on the donkey and the son’s turn to walk along with them. This time the father faces severe criticism for being selfish and not caring about his young son. Now they get puzzled as to what might be the appropriate combination to opt for as all the combinations, duo riding the donkey, the duo walking along with the donkey, the son riding the donkey while father walks and the father rides the donkey while the son walks, had exhausted.
It was at this point in time when they were yet to travel a distance of 6 more miles; they come across a sage and consult him for his advice. The sage listens to the entire episode and gives a quite chuckle before he speaks. He asks them, “Having tried all the options did you both avoid criticism. No! So, what you must do… is a very simple option, if you answer this question.” Eagerly the father-son duo says “Yes”. The sage asks them, “Among all the options which one did you find the most convenient?” Both of them reply in unison, “The first option, when both of us were riding on the donkey”. “Then what is the need to be confused! Just do that. But remember, you have wasted 60% of journey, by trying to avoid criticism from the public. Had you not cared about it, by now you would have reached your destination happily”
Bitter truth is that many of us continue to waste 60% of our lives bowing to criticism from the public and end up doing what is NOT convenient to us. May be all of us should follow the sage’s advice in each and every step of our life. Because the choice is simple; Put yourself in discomfort, there will be criticism. Make yourself comfortable, there will be criticism. Why not go for the second option when we are sure of not being able to avoid criticism?
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Realization, Apology and Beyond
This write up is based on my previous article, The Great Indian Paradox. So, in case you haven’t read that one, do it before you read this one!
My previous article invited a lot of criticism from quite a few of my able readers. This forced me to re-think on it, in terms of the concept, argument and conclusion. After an earnest effort I realized some serious shortcomings in it. They were… My conclusion was based upon very specific examples, and in doing so, I contradicted a golden rule, ‘exceptions don’t prove a law’. Many other reasons were brought to my notice as to why Indians travel abroad and live there, which I had not taken into consideration. At one point I decided to scrap that entire article, but realized that a person cannot be right all the time. Mistakes do happen, but once pointed out; the following actions must be taken. Acknowledge the fact that you were wrong, apologize for it and try to fix it.
So I apologize for my previous conclusion which was based upon a half-baked idea.
Here, I would like to sight some good counter examples to my previously sighted examples and conclude just the opposite of what I had concluded earlier.
A vast majority of Indians travel abroad for more opportunities at personal as well as professional front. If our country has less opportunities (compared to the developed countries), this doesn’t make our country ordinary. Also, just living in our own country doesn’t qualify a person to be termed a patriot. Moreover if a person lives abroad and contributes to his country, directly or indirectly, it certainly is an act of patriotism.
The prominent examples of such personalities which I would sight are Jiddu Krishnamurti, Amartya Sen, and of course Aravind Adiga.
For beginners, Jiddu Krishnamurti (JK as he was popularly known), was one of the awe-inspiring writers, public speakers and philosophers of the 19th century. He came from a very poor family and could barely speak English. But, during the British raj, Annie Besant took him into her custody, recognizing his potential and leadership qualities. This gave him a good exposure to various subjects including English. Later on he travelled to Europe and America giving public speeches in English about spirituality, psychological revolution, the nature of the mind, meditation, human relationships, and how to enact positive change in society. He continued living in Ojai (pronounced as O-high), California, for the rest of his life and was awarded UN peace medal in 1984. He couldn’t have achieved all this, had he not travelled abroad. Also his was a fair choice to opt for travelling abroad when it had boiled down to a prosperous life, growth and opportunities at one end or live in poverty, ill-health and illiteracy, instead.
It is highly unlikely that you haven’t heard about Amartya Sen. Even in his case, had he not travelled to the UK and subsequently to the US, it would have been almost impossible for him to win a Nobel Prize. (He won the Nobel Prize for Economics in 1998) He undertook travel, purely for his academic work and research purpose. There was more opportunity in these two countries than ours, so he could do what he did. Again would it be fair on us to expect him to have remained confined to our country and not made contributions to the economic advances of the world. I guess not!
The last, but not the least, example I would like to sight is that of Aravind Adiga, who won the 2008 Man Booker’s Prize for his book The White Tiger. Adiga, travelled to Australia along with his family at the age of 16. Later he went to the prestigious Columbia University in the US, where he obtained his degree in literature. Later, he travelled to the Oxford University on a scholarship to pursue his Masters. Now having that kinda educational background, it was only appropriate for him to take up a job opportunity in a firm which matched his standard. So, he worked for the Wall Street Journal and again undertook extensive travel. After he won the Booker Prize, in his interview, he credited his achievements to his job which provided him with extensive travel opportunities along with the people of India.
Now, would it not be appropriate for us to term these intellects as true patriots who have put us on the global map because of their contribution to the society. In deed this is true service to the nation.
All the above mentioned people achieved personal as well as professional growth by traveling abroad. So if a person wants to grow, by no means he/she becomes less patriotic towards his/her nation. A country becomes great only if its people achieve higher standards on both, personal as well as professional front.
These were just few names that I sighted, and I am sure you could find a few hundred more similar names without much efforts. Clearly the counter examples outnumber the earlier sighted examples. So, the conclusion based upon the counter examples must be definitely stronger and more accurate than the previous one drawn.
My previous article invited a lot of criticism from quite a few of my able readers. This forced me to re-think on it, in terms of the concept, argument and conclusion. After an earnest effort I realized some serious shortcomings in it. They were… My conclusion was based upon very specific examples, and in doing so, I contradicted a golden rule, ‘exceptions don’t prove a law’. Many other reasons were brought to my notice as to why Indians travel abroad and live there, which I had not taken into consideration. At one point I decided to scrap that entire article, but realized that a person cannot be right all the time. Mistakes do happen, but once pointed out; the following actions must be taken. Acknowledge the fact that you were wrong, apologize for it and try to fix it.
So I apologize for my previous conclusion which was based upon a half-baked idea.
Here, I would like to sight some good counter examples to my previously sighted examples and conclude just the opposite of what I had concluded earlier.
A vast majority of Indians travel abroad for more opportunities at personal as well as professional front. If our country has less opportunities (compared to the developed countries), this doesn’t make our country ordinary. Also, just living in our own country doesn’t qualify a person to be termed a patriot. Moreover if a person lives abroad and contributes to his country, directly or indirectly, it certainly is an act of patriotism.
The prominent examples of such personalities which I would sight are Jiddu Krishnamurti, Amartya Sen, and of course Aravind Adiga.
For beginners, Jiddu Krishnamurti (JK as he was popularly known), was one of the awe-inspiring writers, public speakers and philosophers of the 19th century. He came from a very poor family and could barely speak English. But, during the British raj, Annie Besant took him into her custody, recognizing his potential and leadership qualities. This gave him a good exposure to various subjects including English. Later on he travelled to Europe and America giving public speeches in English about spirituality, psychological revolution, the nature of the mind, meditation, human relationships, and how to enact positive change in society. He continued living in Ojai (pronounced as O-high), California, for the rest of his life and was awarded UN peace medal in 1984. He couldn’t have achieved all this, had he not travelled abroad. Also his was a fair choice to opt for travelling abroad when it had boiled down to a prosperous life, growth and opportunities at one end or live in poverty, ill-health and illiteracy, instead.
It is highly unlikely that you haven’t heard about Amartya Sen. Even in his case, had he not travelled to the UK and subsequently to the US, it would have been almost impossible for him to win a Nobel Prize. (He won the Nobel Prize for Economics in 1998) He undertook travel, purely for his academic work and research purpose. There was more opportunity in these two countries than ours, so he could do what he did. Again would it be fair on us to expect him to have remained confined to our country and not made contributions to the economic advances of the world. I guess not!
The last, but not the least, example I would like to sight is that of Aravind Adiga, who won the 2008 Man Booker’s Prize for his book The White Tiger. Adiga, travelled to Australia along with his family at the age of 16. Later he went to the prestigious Columbia University in the US, where he obtained his degree in literature. Later, he travelled to the Oxford University on a scholarship to pursue his Masters. Now having that kinda educational background, it was only appropriate for him to take up a job opportunity in a firm which matched his standard. So, he worked for the Wall Street Journal and again undertook extensive travel. After he won the Booker Prize, in his interview, he credited his achievements to his job which provided him with extensive travel opportunities along with the people of India.
Now, would it not be appropriate for us to term these intellects as true patriots who have put us on the global map because of their contribution to the society. In deed this is true service to the nation.
All the above mentioned people achieved personal as well as professional growth by traveling abroad. So if a person wants to grow, by no means he/she becomes less patriotic towards his/her nation. A country becomes great only if its people achieve higher standards on both, personal as well as professional front.
These were just few names that I sighted, and I am sure you could find a few hundred more similar names without much efforts. Clearly the counter examples outnumber the earlier sighted examples. So, the conclusion based upon the counter examples must be definitely stronger and more accurate than the previous one drawn.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
The Great Indian Paradox
I am writing this article, after a kind of discussion or rather call it an argument. With whom? Ah! That doesn’t really matter. But I guess my observation over past few months has forced me to write on this topic. So, here I go…
My first question is, “Is India a great country?” If you are an Indian you not only answered “YES” but also would have used some swear words at me in your mind for this weird question. Now my next question is… “If India is such a great country, why are many Indians trying not only to go abroad, but also to settle down there?” Ha! Now that’s a question which doesn’t have an obvious answer. Right?
I have couple of friends from Europe, namely from France and Germany. Even they have come to the US for their higher studies. I have had conversation with both of them about their future plans. Both have similar kind of plans, complete studies and get back home for a career. But most of my Indian friends have only one aim, or rather set of aims. It goes something like this… Complete studies, find a job, get a H1B visa (work visa), stay long enough so that they can obtain a green card (permanent US residency) and ultimately settle down here.
I have also had several conversations with some American folks. I have asked them, if given a chance would they prefer to work in India for some years. Their polite answer has been, India is superb country, which is certainly worth visiting. But when it comes to working, our preference remains US and only US. There is so much of cultural difference between India and US, the food is entirely different and the weather too doesn’t suit us.
I discussed these two instances, the European guys’ one and the American guys’ one, with a friend of mine. He was not at all surprised by their respective words and reaction. This prompted me to ask him some questions… “If the European guys feel US is more advanced than their home countries but still want to return to their home countries, because they miss their own people, own language , don’t Indians miss their home country, their own people and own language?” “If Americans feel that India is too different compared to US in terms of culture, climate and food, don’t Indians feel that US is too different with respect to the same parameters.” He was silent when asked these questions to him.
The only two conclusions I could draw from the above were; One, India is not a great country, otherwise why would people be so eager to go away and never come back to it. Second one; there must be something wrong with Indian people who are more than eager to leave their own motherland, culture and people, which they feel is great. Logic says that either one of the two conclusions must be true.
My first question is, “Is India a great country?” If you are an Indian you not only answered “YES” but also would have used some swear words at me in your mind for this weird question. Now my next question is… “If India is such a great country, why are many Indians trying not only to go abroad, but also to settle down there?” Ha! Now that’s a question which doesn’t have an obvious answer. Right?
I have couple of friends from Europe, namely from France and Germany. Even they have come to the US for their higher studies. I have had conversation with both of them about their future plans. Both have similar kind of plans, complete studies and get back home for a career. But most of my Indian friends have only one aim, or rather set of aims. It goes something like this… Complete studies, find a job, get a H1B visa (work visa), stay long enough so that they can obtain a green card (permanent US residency) and ultimately settle down here.
I have also had several conversations with some American folks. I have asked them, if given a chance would they prefer to work in India for some years. Their polite answer has been, India is superb country, which is certainly worth visiting. But when it comes to working, our preference remains US and only US. There is so much of cultural difference between India and US, the food is entirely different and the weather too doesn’t suit us.
I discussed these two instances, the European guys’ one and the American guys’ one, with a friend of mine. He was not at all surprised by their respective words and reaction. This prompted me to ask him some questions… “If the European guys feel US is more advanced than their home countries but still want to return to their home countries, because they miss their own people, own language , don’t Indians miss their home country, their own people and own language?” “If Americans feel that India is too different compared to US in terms of culture, climate and food, don’t Indians feel that US is too different with respect to the same parameters.” He was silent when asked these questions to him.
The only two conclusions I could draw from the above were; One, India is not a great country, otherwise why would people be so eager to go away and never come back to it. Second one; there must be something wrong with Indian people who are more than eager to leave their own motherland, culture and people, which they feel is great. Logic says that either one of the two conclusions must be true.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Different Seasons!
I am writing here, after one complete month’s interval. That’s too long a gap to update a blog. My sincere apologies for that.
For those into serious reading, might guess where I flicked this title from… Yes, from the famous novel by the same name by one of the most prolific writers, Stephen King. To give you an insight of this book, it’s a novel that comprises of four finest stories, of which three have been made into Hollywood blockbusters. Let’s stop at this point about the book, as I am too ordinary a critique to give my review on it.
The reason for me to use the same name is the similarity between the novel and this article. Naah! I am not writing four short stories… but four incidences that occurred here in past few days.
The first one…
On March 1st, 2009 it snowed like crazy in Athens, GA. The temperatures went down from 12 degrees C a day prior to this to -8 degrees C on that day. In one week the temperature gradually got to normal and to everyone’s surprise, it touched 28 degrees C on March 8th, 2009. On this day the sun was merciless on everyone’s scalp. (Though the temperature appears to be less, it gets very hot and humid out here). And today, on March 15th, 2009 after a warm and sunny week, it rained like crazy, bringing the mercury levels down to 4 degrees C. It’s hard to believe that how the weather conditions have paradoxically changed. Three consecutive Sundays and totally different weather on all occasions. Hard to believe and even harder to explain I should say!
The second one…
Having lived here for a fairly long time now, I have seen the kinda life-style that the westerners adopt. So, informing parents about their wedding a week or two prior to it is a normal practice here. But what I saw in a restaurant is worth writing. I saw four people, of which two were elderly couple and two were young couples (appeared to be). As they were sitting right behind me, unintentionally I ended up playing an eavesdropper and happened to listen to their conversation. The elderly woman said this, “Mark, your choice is excellent. Having interacted with Briana for almost one day, I am giving you a nod to go ahead with your engagement. Initially I was apprehensive about your marriage with her, as she isn’t a Southern Bell. (A young girl from Southern part of US is referred to as Southern Bell) But she is a very nice girl. I am proud of you my son!” The youngsters were all happy after hearing these words. My conclusion that the parents don’t have any say in their children’s marriage in the western culture, proved to be wrong.
The Third one…
A few days ago, I went to a kinda deserted place. While waiting for the bus, four African-American men approached me and started demanding some money. I happened to carry a lot of money that day (extremely rare for me to do that). Fearing that they might take away all the money that I had, instead of just $10 (which they demanded), I avoided giving them money using all my verbal skills for a while and then later escaped from there without any fuzz. Later, I shared this incident with many of friends, relatives etc. A common conclusion was drawn. African-American men are very dangerous. May be their poverty or laziness was the root cause of all evil. I lived by this faith for some time. But today, when I got a ride back home in taxi, I had to re-think on it. The driver, Derrick Malcolm was an African-American, which made me feel uncomfortable while boarding the cab. On my way back home, I had a very good conversation with him. He not only seemed to be a reasonable man, but also had very good general knowledge. Later on I got to know that he was an educated man and had served in the US Navy for a while. Driving a cab was his secondary source of income. I should admit he was the friendliest cab driver I had ever travelled with. This forced me to conclude that it’s is not right to brand a community as evil, taking into consideration few people. This was contradictory to my previous conclusion.
Last, but not the least…
If you have known me for a while, you may know that I have always considered marriage as a liability and not an asset. For the just concluded vacation I visited my friend. He has been happily married for 8 months now. I saw the manner in which his wife took his care, helped him get over the stress at office and consistently supported him. My friend is really lucky to have such a wonderful wife and vice versa. He too admitted that after marriage life was much better than that in the past. The first day I got the impression that life becomes all-good after marriage. I had started to believe that my conclusion in the past about married life was wrong. But slowly I started getting complains and negative sides by the second and the third day, mostly from his wife. There were fair amount of negatives they had to deal with, but these two optimistic guys have decided to focus on positives, which is not an easy affair. So, in this case, I still uphold my previous idea.
On my way back, I saw a quote on guy’s T-Shirt, which for sure made me chuckle. It read something like this… “96% men are fools, as only 4% of them stay single”
The above four incidents were a result of my deep observation in the past few days. No wonder that my University was closed for one week on account of the Spring Break!
Wish you a very happy spring season, the best among four different seasons.
For those into serious reading, might guess where I flicked this title from… Yes, from the famous novel by the same name by one of the most prolific writers, Stephen King. To give you an insight of this book, it’s a novel that comprises of four finest stories, of which three have been made into Hollywood blockbusters. Let’s stop at this point about the book, as I am too ordinary a critique to give my review on it.
The reason for me to use the same name is the similarity between the novel and this article. Naah! I am not writing four short stories… but four incidences that occurred here in past few days.
The first one…
On March 1st, 2009 it snowed like crazy in Athens, GA. The temperatures went down from 12 degrees C a day prior to this to -8 degrees C on that day. In one week the temperature gradually got to normal and to everyone’s surprise, it touched 28 degrees C on March 8th, 2009. On this day the sun was merciless on everyone’s scalp. (Though the temperature appears to be less, it gets very hot and humid out here). And today, on March 15th, 2009 after a warm and sunny week, it rained like crazy, bringing the mercury levels down to 4 degrees C. It’s hard to believe that how the weather conditions have paradoxically changed. Three consecutive Sundays and totally different weather on all occasions. Hard to believe and even harder to explain I should say!
The second one…
Having lived here for a fairly long time now, I have seen the kinda life-style that the westerners adopt. So, informing parents about their wedding a week or two prior to it is a normal practice here. But what I saw in a restaurant is worth writing. I saw four people, of which two were elderly couple and two were young couples (appeared to be). As they were sitting right behind me, unintentionally I ended up playing an eavesdropper and happened to listen to their conversation. The elderly woman said this, “Mark, your choice is excellent. Having interacted with Briana for almost one day, I am giving you a nod to go ahead with your engagement. Initially I was apprehensive about your marriage with her, as she isn’t a Southern Bell. (A young girl from Southern part of US is referred to as Southern Bell) But she is a very nice girl. I am proud of you my son!” The youngsters were all happy after hearing these words. My conclusion that the parents don’t have any say in their children’s marriage in the western culture, proved to be wrong.
The Third one…
A few days ago, I went to a kinda deserted place. While waiting for the bus, four African-American men approached me and started demanding some money. I happened to carry a lot of money that day (extremely rare for me to do that). Fearing that they might take away all the money that I had, instead of just $10 (which they demanded), I avoided giving them money using all my verbal skills for a while and then later escaped from there without any fuzz. Later, I shared this incident with many of friends, relatives etc. A common conclusion was drawn. African-American men are very dangerous. May be their poverty or laziness was the root cause of all evil. I lived by this faith for some time. But today, when I got a ride back home in taxi, I had to re-think on it. The driver, Derrick Malcolm was an African-American, which made me feel uncomfortable while boarding the cab. On my way back home, I had a very good conversation with him. He not only seemed to be a reasonable man, but also had very good general knowledge. Later on I got to know that he was an educated man and had served in the US Navy for a while. Driving a cab was his secondary source of income. I should admit he was the friendliest cab driver I had ever travelled with. This forced me to conclude that it’s is not right to brand a community as evil, taking into consideration few people. This was contradictory to my previous conclusion.
Last, but not the least…
If you have known me for a while, you may know that I have always considered marriage as a liability and not an asset. For the just concluded vacation I visited my friend. He has been happily married for 8 months now. I saw the manner in which his wife took his care, helped him get over the stress at office and consistently supported him. My friend is really lucky to have such a wonderful wife and vice versa. He too admitted that after marriage life was much better than that in the past. The first day I got the impression that life becomes all-good after marriage. I had started to believe that my conclusion in the past about married life was wrong. But slowly I started getting complains and negative sides by the second and the third day, mostly from his wife. There were fair amount of negatives they had to deal with, but these two optimistic guys have decided to focus on positives, which is not an easy affair. So, in this case, I still uphold my previous idea.
On my way back, I saw a quote on guy’s T-Shirt, which for sure made me chuckle. It read something like this… “96% men are fools, as only 4% of them stay single”
The above four incidents were a result of my deep observation in the past few days. No wonder that my University was closed for one week on account of the Spring Break!
Wish you a very happy spring season, the best among four different seasons.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Who’s the winner?
Not very long ago, a philosopher once said, “When one standpoint gets to an extreme, sooner or later it will fall to the other extreme”. This logic didn’t make more sense to me for a while. But, with time, I realized, it works. And now, after this year’s Valentine’s Day (V-Day), I realized this logic works very well.
No matter, which part of the world you live in; you surely would have seen the visuals of some hooligans displaying their bad behavior in the city of Mangalore, Karnataka, a few days ago. Later, these hooligans made their act look and sound as a deed of bravery and protective one. Our dear media sold this news probably with little addition, subtraction, multiplication and division!
So, what was this bunch of people trying to do, on the forthcoming V-Day? What message they tried to pass down to the common people, like me and you? You don’t require a brain of Rocket Scientist to give the answer to this question… Do you? By selecting a blasphemous issue of V-Day celebration, a lot of hue and cry was created. These people made their intention of disrupting the planned celebration very clear. And what was the impact of all this on the society. Firstly, there was a divided opinion amongst people as to who was right and who was wrong! Secondly people got more determined to celebrate V-Day and visit pubs.
The impact was a big one… A fairly large number of people celebrated V-Day in their own way. Most of them celebrated it with greets and gift articles from multinational galleries, etc. Then there was the popular act of sending the “Pink Chaddis” to the people who were opposed to the celebration. As a result, the past V-Day celebration was the biggest ever in India. An American company estimated the expenses in India on account of V-Day, on gifts, restaurants, pubs, etc to approximately Rs. 50 crore. Remember, this is not the best of years to spend money, as the grey clouds of recession are existing all over the world.
Now, let’s give our brain some work out. Imagine I am entrepreneur. So, my main objective in this recession hit year would be to increase my sales. How do I do that? The main way to promote any sale is by working on human psychology (ask any MBA holder in Marketing, if you don’t trust me). If I am aware of the logic, that by pushing one stand to extreme, sooner or later it will fall to the other extreme; I can control my prospective customer’s mind. It’s simple, instead of spending money on marketing, distribute it amongst some jobless people (you see there are quite a few jobless people in our country). Ask them to do something, which makes people feel that they would not be allowed to celebrate V-Day. As a result, out of more curiosity, more people would go out and celebrate (spend money).
I guess this method works wonders and can be applied in our day to day life as well. Regarding the V-Day, I would say neither the common people nor the extremist ended up as winners. The unanimous winners for me were pub owners, gift-gallery owners, and not to forget the garment manufacturers (thanks to the Pink Chaddi campaign). And if you are one of those who considered V-Day as impious event, and didn’t end up spending big bucks, I should admit, you outsmarted a good business strategy!
No matter, which part of the world you live in; you surely would have seen the visuals of some hooligans displaying their bad behavior in the city of Mangalore, Karnataka, a few days ago. Later, these hooligans made their act look and sound as a deed of bravery and protective one. Our dear media sold this news probably with little addition, subtraction, multiplication and division!
So, what was this bunch of people trying to do, on the forthcoming V-Day? What message they tried to pass down to the common people, like me and you? You don’t require a brain of Rocket Scientist to give the answer to this question… Do you? By selecting a blasphemous issue of V-Day celebration, a lot of hue and cry was created. These people made their intention of disrupting the planned celebration very clear. And what was the impact of all this on the society. Firstly, there was a divided opinion amongst people as to who was right and who was wrong! Secondly people got more determined to celebrate V-Day and visit pubs.
The impact was a big one… A fairly large number of people celebrated V-Day in their own way. Most of them celebrated it with greets and gift articles from multinational galleries, etc. Then there was the popular act of sending the “Pink Chaddis” to the people who were opposed to the celebration. As a result, the past V-Day celebration was the biggest ever in India. An American company estimated the expenses in India on account of V-Day, on gifts, restaurants, pubs, etc to approximately Rs. 50 crore. Remember, this is not the best of years to spend money, as the grey clouds of recession are existing all over the world.
Now, let’s give our brain some work out. Imagine I am entrepreneur. So, my main objective in this recession hit year would be to increase my sales. How do I do that? The main way to promote any sale is by working on human psychology (ask any MBA holder in Marketing, if you don’t trust me). If I am aware of the logic, that by pushing one stand to extreme, sooner or later it will fall to the other extreme; I can control my prospective customer’s mind. It’s simple, instead of spending money on marketing, distribute it amongst some jobless people (you see there are quite a few jobless people in our country). Ask them to do something, which makes people feel that they would not be allowed to celebrate V-Day. As a result, out of more curiosity, more people would go out and celebrate (spend money).
I guess this method works wonders and can be applied in our day to day life as well. Regarding the V-Day, I would say neither the common people nor the extremist ended up as winners. The unanimous winners for me were pub owners, gift-gallery owners, and not to forget the garment manufacturers (thanks to the Pink Chaddi campaign). And if you are one of those who considered V-Day as impious event, and didn’t end up spending big bucks, I should admit, you outsmarted a good business strategy!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
The White Tiger from a Slum of the Republic of India
If you are puzzled over the title that I have given to this post, I assure you it's not as illogical as it might perhaps sound. Here, I am writing briefly about three topics...
1) The White Tiger (The book that won last year's Booker Prize, by Aravind Adiga)
2) Slumdog Millionaire (Danny Boyle’s latest flick, popular globally)
3) Republic of India (our country is going to celebrate 60th Republic day today)
If you haven't read "The White Tiger" (TWT), I strongly recommend you to read it. It is a good read and will serve as an eye opener. An amazing book, written in fairly simple language, with subtle sense of humor, questioning some of the fundamental practices in our country and exposing some of the dark sides. This book captures the reason for typical behavior amongst some sections of our society. No one can repent reading this book.
Slumdog Millionaire (SM), do I need to write anything about this movie. Even before it released in India, it had made a big name winning so many Oscar nominations. A well made movie, which should not be taken too seriously but should be appreciated for it's creativity and various performances.
I see a lot of similarities between TWT and SM.
Both TWT and SM deal with similar subject, from Rags to Riches. In TWT, the protagonist, Balram Halwai, a servant in Laxamangarh, who becomes a driver in Dhanbad and eventually goes on to become an entrepreneur in Bangalore. While Jamal Malik in SM, a product of a typical Mumbai slum, manages to become a Chai wala and goes on to win 20 million rupees in a game show.
Both TWT and SM invited a fair amount of criticism by many Indians. The common reason was, critiques claimed that both TWT and SM sold the poverty porn of India to the west.
I beg to differ with such critiques. Firstly, I felt that both the stories mainly focused on the hardships that the respective protagonist underwent. In this process both the stories had to show the darker sides of our country. Secondly, I ask honestly, doesn't poverty exist in India? Had India been a self-sufficient country with absolutely no issues concerning poverty and bias against the weaker sections, I would give it to the critiques. But the bitter truth of this matter is that there still exist a lot of poverty, inequality and injustice in our country. It may hurt, but that's the way it is.
The people who do not accept this, are either the top 10% of India, whose life is so deeply buried in the comforts that they cannot recognize such a sad state or those people who want to criticize everything and appreciate nothing. The weaker sections in our country still lag a lot of resources. The biggest problem in our country is un-uniform distribution of wealth. The rich of our country, when they criticize such portrayal of our country, show the same attitude as that of Marie Antoinette, the French queen in 18th century, who once said, "If you don't have bread, eat cake" Such people would want to portray India as a super rich country, which probably builds better brands for their businesses in the west.
In TWT, Aravind Adiga goes on to write something like this… “Sir, I don’t envy the rich in the US and the UK. They have not seen comforts of having a servant or anything close to it”. Having lived away from India, I totally understand what he ment by those words.
If we can't recognize wrongs, fine, at least let us not criticize the intellects, who are able do so. But it would do no harm in appreciating the merits of such artists. After all they are bringing name, fame and glory to our nation. Aren’t they?
On the 60th Republic day, I wish all my Indian brothers and sisters, a very happy Republic day. Let's hope that our country continues to develop rapidly. Proud to be an Indian. Jai Hind!
1) The White Tiger (The book that won last year's Booker Prize, by Aravind Adiga)
2) Slumdog Millionaire (Danny Boyle’s latest flick, popular globally)
3) Republic of India (our country is going to celebrate 60th Republic day today)
If you haven't read "The White Tiger" (TWT), I strongly recommend you to read it. It is a good read and will serve as an eye opener. An amazing book, written in fairly simple language, with subtle sense of humor, questioning some of the fundamental practices in our country and exposing some of the dark sides. This book captures the reason for typical behavior amongst some sections of our society. No one can repent reading this book.
Slumdog Millionaire (SM), do I need to write anything about this movie. Even before it released in India, it had made a big name winning so many Oscar nominations. A well made movie, which should not be taken too seriously but should be appreciated for it's creativity and various performances.
I see a lot of similarities between TWT and SM.
Both TWT and SM deal with similar subject, from Rags to Riches. In TWT, the protagonist, Balram Halwai, a servant in Laxamangarh, who becomes a driver in Dhanbad and eventually goes on to become an entrepreneur in Bangalore. While Jamal Malik in SM, a product of a typical Mumbai slum, manages to become a Chai wala and goes on to win 20 million rupees in a game show.
Both TWT and SM invited a fair amount of criticism by many Indians. The common reason was, critiques claimed that both TWT and SM sold the poverty porn of India to the west.
I beg to differ with such critiques. Firstly, I felt that both the stories mainly focused on the hardships that the respective protagonist underwent. In this process both the stories had to show the darker sides of our country. Secondly, I ask honestly, doesn't poverty exist in India? Had India been a self-sufficient country with absolutely no issues concerning poverty and bias against the weaker sections, I would give it to the critiques. But the bitter truth of this matter is that there still exist a lot of poverty, inequality and injustice in our country. It may hurt, but that's the way it is.
The people who do not accept this, are either the top 10% of India, whose life is so deeply buried in the comforts that they cannot recognize such a sad state or those people who want to criticize everything and appreciate nothing. The weaker sections in our country still lag a lot of resources. The biggest problem in our country is un-uniform distribution of wealth. The rich of our country, when they criticize such portrayal of our country, show the same attitude as that of Marie Antoinette, the French queen in 18th century, who once said, "If you don't have bread, eat cake" Such people would want to portray India as a super rich country, which probably builds better brands for their businesses in the west.
In TWT, Aravind Adiga goes on to write something like this… “Sir, I don’t envy the rich in the US and the UK. They have not seen comforts of having a servant or anything close to it”. Having lived away from India, I totally understand what he ment by those words.
If we can't recognize wrongs, fine, at least let us not criticize the intellects, who are able do so. But it would do no harm in appreciating the merits of such artists. After all they are bringing name, fame and glory to our nation. Aren’t they?
On the 60th Republic day, I wish all my Indian brothers and sisters, a very happy Republic day. Let's hope that our country continues to develop rapidly. Proud to be an Indian. Jai Hind!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
From Big Peach to Big Apple and Back!
This was my most awaited vacation after a long struggle with academics. Finally there came the day, when I was supposed to go to New York City (NYC), for a vacation. For beginners, Atlanta is referred to as Big Peach while NYC is referred to as Big Apple. This might give you the hang about where I started off to where I went. If you expect me to describe about the places that I visited and the things I did over there… you would be disappointed. This piece of writing is about my experience at the Liberty International Airport, Newark, NJ.
Before going to NY, I was totally fed up with the life that I was leading here. My schedule has been packed, right from the time I have been here. I can safely say that I am jaded because of the multi-tasking that I have been doing. The fun factor has been next to zero. In NYC, it was great to meet some of my friends, visit some of the land mark places. Also one of my biggest complaints about not being able to watch any bolloywood flicks was also answered when I watched the Aamir Khan starrer Ghajini in a theater. But I had gotten so much used to complaining that I couldn’t resist complaining even about a city like NYC. I stared on by complaining to my friends about the nasty weather; the high expenses and amount of walking one needs in every part of NYC. I felt that overall the condition there too wasn’t the greatest of ones.
After the trip concluded, I was on my way back home, pretty much complaining to myself. Now, all that I needed was to return home at the earliest. To add to this, I realized that my flight was moved up 30 minutes earlier to its scheduled time. So, I had to miss this flight. I didn’t know what next???
A person on the side walk, just outside the terminal of the Airport asked me to contact the personnel at counter 6, and pointed out towards a long queue. I was kinda frustrated and tried to call my mom, unsuccessfully, because of weak signal. I knew she was nearly 10,000 miles away from me and could do nothing more, beyond sympathetic words. The very idea of being last in such a long queue and the anxiety bothered me a lot. But, there was no option. So, I joined the queue. About a couple of minutes later, I saw another young man coming and joining the queue. In a way, I felt better, as I was not last member of this long queue anymore.
I was in no mood to start the conversation, but I was eager to talk to him as even he was travelling to Atlanta by the next flight. I guess he read this eagerness on my face and started the conversation. I told him about what my condition is… how it feels to be away from home for 5 long months… what were my challenges and hardships etc. He listened to all this with great patience and timely acknowledgements. Finally I too decided to ask him about his travel plans, where he was working et al. His reply was, “I want to cancel my today’s travel tickets. I will leave tomorrow. I neither work here nor in Atlanta. From there, I have connecting flight. I was home for Christmas, nearly after one year. I know how it feels to be away from home for a long time. So, I want to spend one extra day with my family”. I felt somewhat dreadful, as I was complaining about being away from home for 5 months and here was guy who was younger than me by two years and away from home for nearly one year. Before I asked him any further questions, he told, “But you are quite lucky to be in a safe country like US. Here, you have all facilities and there must a lot of folks from your country too”. Immediately I thought, “THESE AMERICANS! Huh, they always feel that their country is good on every front”. I answered, “Not quite; this is no doubt a good place, but transport isn’t as good as it is back home. Above all our food is quite different and I get to eat our kinda meals, just about 5-6 times a week.” To this he paused… and I asked him, “So, where do you work. Don’t you get your food, transport and other facilities at your place of work”. He smiled and said, “Not quite. It wouldn’t be fair on me to expect such facilities there. I am Second Lieutenant in the US Army. From the past one year, I have been posted to Iraq. Forget about facilities that you mentioned, I even don’t know whether I will be able to meet my family again, once I am out there.” I really felt ashamed and realized that how big a difference was there in my being away from home and his being away from home.
I politely said to him, “I am really sorry, I didn’t know you were in a battle field. I am sure that the conditions out there must be miserable and you must be hating every single moment of it. I hope and pray that you get shifted some other base in US as soon as possible”
To this, the reply that he gave, futher made me feel guilty of commiting another crime. “Don’t pray for my relocation. Pray that the war ends soon. But I don’t consider the condition to be miserable. When I joined the services, I was prepared for all this. It’s my duty and I should do it with fullest commitment. In life, you can either spend your time complaining about the things you do and achieve nothing or work hard and make the difference.” While I shook hands with him, he was called to another counter and I went to counter 6. In this process, I couldn’t ask his name. Actually, his name doesn’t matter at all. But his message surely does.
So, my New Year resolution for 2009 is “Stop complaining, Start working!”
Wish all the readers a very happy New Year!!!
Before going to NY, I was totally fed up with the life that I was leading here. My schedule has been packed, right from the time I have been here. I can safely say that I am jaded because of the multi-tasking that I have been doing. The fun factor has been next to zero. In NYC, it was great to meet some of my friends, visit some of the land mark places. Also one of my biggest complaints about not being able to watch any bolloywood flicks was also answered when I watched the Aamir Khan starrer Ghajini in a theater. But I had gotten so much used to complaining that I couldn’t resist complaining even about a city like NYC. I stared on by complaining to my friends about the nasty weather; the high expenses and amount of walking one needs in every part of NYC. I felt that overall the condition there too wasn’t the greatest of ones.
After the trip concluded, I was on my way back home, pretty much complaining to myself. Now, all that I needed was to return home at the earliest. To add to this, I realized that my flight was moved up 30 minutes earlier to its scheduled time. So, I had to miss this flight. I didn’t know what next???
A person on the side walk, just outside the terminal of the Airport asked me to contact the personnel at counter 6, and pointed out towards a long queue. I was kinda frustrated and tried to call my mom, unsuccessfully, because of weak signal. I knew she was nearly 10,000 miles away from me and could do nothing more, beyond sympathetic words. The very idea of being last in such a long queue and the anxiety bothered me a lot. But, there was no option. So, I joined the queue. About a couple of minutes later, I saw another young man coming and joining the queue. In a way, I felt better, as I was not last member of this long queue anymore.
I was in no mood to start the conversation, but I was eager to talk to him as even he was travelling to Atlanta by the next flight. I guess he read this eagerness on my face and started the conversation. I told him about what my condition is… how it feels to be away from home for 5 long months… what were my challenges and hardships etc. He listened to all this with great patience and timely acknowledgements. Finally I too decided to ask him about his travel plans, where he was working et al. His reply was, “I want to cancel my today’s travel tickets. I will leave tomorrow. I neither work here nor in Atlanta. From there, I have connecting flight. I was home for Christmas, nearly after one year. I know how it feels to be away from home for a long time. So, I want to spend one extra day with my family”. I felt somewhat dreadful, as I was complaining about being away from home for 5 months and here was guy who was younger than me by two years and away from home for nearly one year. Before I asked him any further questions, he told, “But you are quite lucky to be in a safe country like US. Here, you have all facilities and there must a lot of folks from your country too”. Immediately I thought, “THESE AMERICANS! Huh, they always feel that their country is good on every front”. I answered, “Not quite; this is no doubt a good place, but transport isn’t as good as it is back home. Above all our food is quite different and I get to eat our kinda meals, just about 5-6 times a week.” To this he paused… and I asked him, “So, where do you work. Don’t you get your food, transport and other facilities at your place of work”. He smiled and said, “Not quite. It wouldn’t be fair on me to expect such facilities there. I am Second Lieutenant in the US Army. From the past one year, I have been posted to Iraq. Forget about facilities that you mentioned, I even don’t know whether I will be able to meet my family again, once I am out there.” I really felt ashamed and realized that how big a difference was there in my being away from home and his being away from home.
I politely said to him, “I am really sorry, I didn’t know you were in a battle field. I am sure that the conditions out there must be miserable and you must be hating every single moment of it. I hope and pray that you get shifted some other base in US as soon as possible”
To this, the reply that he gave, futher made me feel guilty of commiting another crime. “Don’t pray for my relocation. Pray that the war ends soon. But I don’t consider the condition to be miserable. When I joined the services, I was prepared for all this. It’s my duty and I should do it with fullest commitment. In life, you can either spend your time complaining about the things you do and achieve nothing or work hard and make the difference.” While I shook hands with him, he was called to another counter and I went to counter 6. In this process, I couldn’t ask his name. Actually, his name doesn’t matter at all. But his message surely does.
So, my New Year resolution for 2009 is “Stop complaining, Start working!”
Wish all the readers a very happy New Year!!!
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